Squishes and wishes

Two weeks ago I went for my yearly torture session at the mammography center. Some of my friends have told me that they don't find this test so torturous. Me? I'd rather go through child birth. I find it SO painful that it brings me to tears. You would think my expression of fear and pain would lead the tech. to be more sensitive and compassionate?? NOT so! They become abrupt and impatient. This time she said to me.. Listen.. we can be done in 5 minutes or I will continue this for 10 hours if that's what it takes! (i wanted to yell...bitch!!) Somehow though, when they have your boob squished in a machine while they are being so rude, it's kind of terrifying to stand up for yourself and tell them off. I try to be very cooperative, hoping to stir up some warmth.
Anyway, After a scare last year which led to FURTER torture and a biopsy but thankfully a good outcome, I became so upset again this year, when they called two days after the squash-fest to tell me I needed further testing (smashing) due to the finding of 'asymmetric density'. For two weeks, I've imagined the worst scenarios (nearly had a car accident while doing so) googled asymmetric density, lost sleep, confided in my best girlfriends, and basically worried myself sick. Yesterday, I was tortured in that obscene machine 5 more times, the last 40 pounds of pressure hurting and pissing me off SO much that I left there swearing Out loud to my husband that I am done with being loyal to preventive health! "NeVER again!!!""

Thankfully I found out once again... I am okay... nothing unusual was seen on the films.
So, How timely was it for me to see the announcement in the news yesterday morning that government scientist are now recommending NOT beginning routine mammograms until you're in your 50's, unless you are in a high risk category. One of the reasons being TOO many false positives. For the past 10 years, I have had at least 3 false positives which led to too much stress and unnecessary radiation and procedures and TOO much SQUiShing! Seeing this new recommendation should then make sense to me, right? Yet, it doesn't. Upon hearing this, I immediately thought of three women who I love who thankfully are alive today, due to a mammography finding their breast cancer while they were in their 40's. I have to believe that these last 10 years of torture couldn't have been needless. Like the pain in child birth, you must get a natural amnesia to mammogram pain, because already today, I feel like if smashing our boobs in a torture chamber once a year can help save just one precious woman, someone's loving Mom, a cherished daughter, a sweet sister or a special friend, then We should continue to listen to the american cancer societies recommendation and continue with these early screenings and of course with self examination. I can't believe this new study is telling us that this is a waste of time too. I, myself discovered a tumor, thankfully benign, in my 30's. I always tell my ladies (my hair clients).... if you don't want to self examine... let your partner or spouse do the exams for you. Not only are you taking preventive measures for your health, but also healthy measures for your relationship!

What also has me worried about this new recommendation, is I am SURE it won't be long before those bastard health insurance companies consider this a very convenient loop hole as to why they shouldn't cover screenings, even if a patients doctor believes in recommending it.
And what I am wishing for... Is a more humane alternative to the Mammogram. My friend was telling me about a painless test called a Thermogram.
Although after researching this, it seems it is best not alone, but in conjunction with the wicked mammo.
To surmise.. I am so grateful that my test findings were good. Breast cancer is so prevalent, especially here on Long Island, that if any change is needed, it's that we need to be More conscientious in finding a cure and doing whatever we can to prevent the devastation of being diagnosed and dealing with breast cancer.

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AH, the wisdom of friends

Well after two and a half months of jumping through ridiculous hoops, my youngest son is FInALLY a jr. volunteer at our local hospital. It is such a long story that I won't bore you too much with the ridiculous rules they had like all the different days your were only allowed to make a call on just for an appointment for a test or shot. Then, Have to wait two weeks and repeat the test just in case of false negatives. The film to see on hand washing, the zillions of attempts at calling for various appointments that never were returned. (Apparently they don't have enough volunteers handling the jr. volunteer program.) I will just say that tonight is his first night, and since he wants to be a nurse, I am hoping it will be a positive experience. They only need him for two hours each friday to transport patients. ( sure at the height of one of the worst pandemics our country has seen, Brilliant Lucy has her kid in contact with the worst of it). I am hoping since he already had the swine flu in June, he has the antibodies to fight off danger. Although, I am considering asking our pediatrician and bringing him in for the vaccine, to be on the safe side.
So anyway.. the whole point of my scribblings, which I've been distracted from... This hospital is 20 minutes from our home. I drove him there and drove 20 minutes back home to do one clients haircut. NOW... in a few minutes I will have to drive another back and forth totaling.. EIGHTY MINUTES .. to have my son do his 2 hour good deed in our community. Hello?? The stupidity of this should have been apparent,no? NO! It wasn't! I needed the advise of my genius friend this morning, who's wisdom shone down on me, like a crazed mothers personal oracle, as she said.. "ARE U CRAZZY??" (wow! I found a way to use the word oracle!)
"Take this time to relax.. find a local book store or coffee shop and just sit with a good book for the two hours." We women really do need each other, don't we?? Especially when stress gets in the way of good old common sense. So I am happily rescheduling my upcoming November and December friday night
clients and I am taking this opportunity that I was going to allow to add additional work and stress in my life... and turning into a night to look forward to. Lucy time.
:))

Did u ever?

One day back in the crazy 70's, I walked into a lavish hair salon, looking for work. The owners were these two free spirited sisters and they gave me my most unusual interview. No social security number needed, No questions like " do you have experience?" or "Are you a licensed cosmetologist?" It was not necessary to bring in a model and do a haircut. All they wanted to know was my birth place/day/ time/ year. They were going to chart me. They needed to find out if I would be in harmony with their surroundings. They called with the bad news the next day. I can tell you for sure, It was the ONLY time I didn't get a job because my sun was in Pisces. Oh well, it worked out For the best, 'cause I had a feeling that their idea of harmony was conflicting with...Planet earths.
for more interviews, visit..Sunday Scribblings

happy halloween

Well it's halloween night. Not much happening. We celebrated last week by going to a party at the dance studio where I take my zumba classes. It was a fun night, that started with a west coast swing lesson and led into dancing all night, buffet and unlimited drinks. All for the amazing cost of 36.oo per couple! Our Friends that came with us were as surprised as we were when everyone on the floor was AMAZING at dancing! It then of course dawned on me... WHO were the guests? Dance instructors and their dancey friends and dance students!! At one point they were all doing some beautiful waltz the same exact way, going the same way around the beautiful dance floor... while the 4 of us clowns (well.. actually 2 pirates and 2 cowboys) were free styling and bumping into them all! After only one cosmo, we didn't care that we were the only foursome that they thought had 8 left feet. We had fun and many laughs and know WE CAN Dance!!

this week was a good one, there's lot's of adventures going on yet it left me once again.. Thinking of my blog.. feeling obligated to write something on it... choosing instead to play my 29 games of scrabble that I have going on on Facebook. Facebook is probably the reason for less blogging. It is quick and a great way to touch base with many with one wall. But.. my blog feels like an old friend. A friend who I will always love but I have less and less to say to her.
So without much thought... I am going to ramble about my week and just fill my old friend in..
This past week, Mr. Petals and I celebrated our 29th anniversary! We had a date day that involved shopping for a dressy dress for me for an upcoming christmas party, A new sports coat for him and Ordering a new railing for our back steps. That evening we enjoyed a lovely romantic italian dinner at Marios.
One day, my son found a weird protrusion on poor Mr. cosmo that ended up being a tick! In all my years of having pets, I've never had a flea or tick on any of them! It looked like a rotten kernel of corn! My smart son insisted that it was some sort of parasite. We ran Cosmo to the vet who confirmed it was an engorged tick. So gross and so worrisome! But he is fine and since it wasn't a deer tick, he won't need to be tested for Lyme. It was so nice that our vet didn't charge us to tweeze it off of him. Cos was pretty stressed, but a few dog treats later.. just fine.
Another on going event of many past weeks is this college application stuff! WHAT an overwhelming, mind boggling process! I feel like WE are so far behind! I use the word WE so much ( We applied here and WE applied there) that my oldest son keeps asking WHerE I am going to be attending college next year!? He is right! I am doing way too much of the stressing over this! I hear my clients tell me that they NeVEr got involved... their kid did Everything!!
you know what?? I am going to add my name to one of these app's.. and You never know.. If I get accepted maybe I will be the one that sets sail next year and my youngest can do all my jobs at home!
Well, once again.. I thought I couldn't blog and I end up writing more than I think anyone will even read. Hope to be back soon

Did you ever?

Lately I keep feeling like our world is getting more and more crazy. People seem to have Less compassion, Less patience, Less humanity than ever before. I questioned if it was just me thinking this way? Am I just getting older and crankier? You know what? No. that is not it. The world IS getting crazier and It isn't just the younger generation. Even older folks are... well .. Losing it! I see more selfishness and rudeness than I ever remember noticing before.

Tonight I spoke to my 80 year old Mom who lives on her own down in Florida.
Mom volunteers at the hospital a few days a week and volunteers as a bingo caller in between.
She has been calling bingo for years and gets much praise for her fun, outgoing personality.
Last week an 87 year old man got a bingo but hesitated a little too long to shout it out and My mom had already called the next number to which 3 additional people shouted BINGo! The 87 year old mans wife began repeatedly calling my mom a BITCH! Screaming that she went too quickly and that her husband deserved the pot all to himself! ISN'T THERE SOMETHING CRAZY AND SO SO WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?? I am telling you, something bizarre, scary and so sad is happening in the world. We seem to be desensitized to the feelings of others. Decency and morals a thing of the past. My poor mom was so upset and didn't know what to say or do.
I feel so bad to know she was spoken to like that. Mom called The director of the senior center, who told her that she did do the right thing.. Once the next ball was in the slot she had to Call it and honor the multiple winners. Just what an 80 year old donating her time needs, right? insults and aggravation.

On the way home from Bingo, mom stopped off for gas. She waited behind a station wagon while he filled up. After he was done.. He continued to sit in his car and chat with the attendant who was apparently his friend. They both acted totally oblivious to the fact that someone else was waiting. After waiting for a good 5 minutes patiently in her car, my mom leaned her head out the window and said.. "excuse me, would you mind getting going now?" The attendant went inside the gas station and the man in the station wagon deliberately just stayed in his car a few minutes longer. She knew it was just to bother her a little bit more!! HE was inconsiderate from the start and because She asked him to move, he decided to torture her even more?? Hello??? Is it just me?? Does this make any sense? Or are you infuriated too? He should have apologized and quickly moved over or out!! Finally my 80 year old (extremely brazen) little mama... Got OUT of her car and started walking towards him. He finally drove off! I got so upset that she did that! I warned her that with the looneys these days, you can NeVER assume he wouldn't have hurt her.
Hasn't this kind of rudeness and maliciousness happened to you? Do u feel it's happening more often too? What do you feel is the best way to handle hateful, ignorant strangers? I always say ignore these types but how can you in the gas station situation? I swear, I wish I could spray my mom with cretin repellant.

From Dizzy to canine.

Being Bored out of my mind for the last two days may be a good reason to try and write a blog post.
On Monday I went to Dr. Gordon's office for the Epley Maneuver. After seeing the Youtube about the procedure I was expecting that it wasn't going to be too awful. Damn You youtube. My experience wasn't so cut and dry or tear free. After the first procedure of gently rotating my body and head for one minute in each position, They told me they now had to repeat the same procedure and this time I most likely would not be as dizzy. As soon as he laid me backwards, not only did the dizziness feel much much worse, i could also feel my eyeballs spinning quickly around in my head!! Nausea kicked in, It was terrifying! As if all that wasn't scary enough, Dr. Gordon indecently said... "This is very unusual" and he began to tell his assistant something about my eyes. I was so busy panicking and crying that I really don't know what he said. I remember saying.. What's wrong !!?What's happening???!! And he said.. I'm not completely sure but just hang in there the spinning will stop any second now.. and it finally did!! He continued with the rotation of positions and explained to my husband Something about my crystals being in different canals, but I really couldn't comprehend it in my state and I didn't need an explanation later either as I was so queasy and lightheaded, and i just wanted to go home.

What I did understand was that i couldn't know for sure if this maneuver cured my vertigo until after 48 hours had passed. So, If I was still feeling dizzy, that didn't mean it was unsuccessful. (but I sure have been frustrated that I am still feeling dizzy and lightheaded)
As part of the after care.. to prevent the ear crystals from being moved back into the sensitive part of the ear, I've been wearing a soft cervical neck collar to prevent sudden head jerks and bending. I can't sleep in bed but in a recliner at no more than a 45 degree angle.


It's been quite uncomfortable but will be worth it if this works..(as u can see, it has been very comfortable for Miss Molly and Mr. Cosmo, who haven't left my side and feet) If it doesn't work.. He wants to repeat the Epley Maneuver when I go back on Tuesday. I've read that Sometimes a few times is the charm.
(Great.)

The strangest thing happened monday night while attempting to sleep in the recliner. At about 4 am.. I heard this high pitched sound. Almost like a radio frequency that was out of whack. Without bending my head, I wrigggled my way out from under Cosmo and out of the recliner and started wandering around my home, trying to find out Which of my sons had left his tv, radio, cds, game player or SPACE TASSER?? on... I went all the way upstairs, I went down again. i went into the basement... and then I realized it was loudest in my kitchen... Where though?? First the napkin holder. I held it up to my ear.. it was buzzing so loudly.. then I put my ear up against the Light switches and FOUnD the source! High pitched sound waves or something?? I was so so confused... and then the light bulb in my dizzy head went off... Holy Shit! this may be ALL in my head?!! In my ears?? Does this mean the maneuver worked? Or does this mean I will be picking up the local radio stations in my ears and fillings now?
As I maneuvered myself and the dogs back down.. I felt this keen sense of hearing for the rest of that early morning.... I heard several loud jets. Trains. (which are so far from our home... I didn't know we ever heard them over here) I heard the crickets as loud as if they were sharing the recliner too. It was the weirdest experience, and I am trying to look at this as a positive sign that I am fixed! Even thought the audiologist said my hearing test last week, was good... who knows... maybe My hearing is even better than good and like My friend Carol said.. Maybe I have dog hearing now! Wouldn't that be great. Well, I already have the collar on.... Maybe I can get a matching leash and pooper scooper for Christmas.

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An exciting addition to our blog family

I want to share a fairly new blog with you! On Lives was created by my sons friend Mike. He has come up with such a clever, creative blog to touch ON so many varied topics in our LIVES. He also has guest writers contributing and from what I've read so far.. Everyone is talented and interesting! Hope you will pop over and browse, comment and then perhaps decide to follow this talented writer.
I've decided to start at his first entry and work my way up his assorted posts.
(btw..ON dishwashing cracked me up!)
Thanks blog buddies... And thanks Mike.. it's so nice to expand my blogging family.