Last week I had an odd thing happen to me. A perfect stranger boldly offered me advice. A man whose company i was in for maybe a half an hour said to me. Can I give you some advice? I said 'Sure"
He said... "you really have to stop saying 'I'm sorry" so often. You've apologized at least 3 times. It makes it look like you have no self worth". I was so taken back. I guess a woman with MORE self worth would have replied.. 'well considering we just met I think it's very forward/presumptuous/nervy/impolite/ of you to offer such advice. Actually I don't really know what a 'normal' woman would respond. What would YOU have said?? Please tell me, because even though I KNOW I am VERY worthy and I totally respect myself I don't think I responded in a self worthy way!! And I often show an insecure side. Would you like to know what I said? I said.... "you know what? My husband has been telling me for many years to stop apologizing" (although my husband NEVER said I don't appear to have self worth) So Mr. Bold said to me.. "well he must love you very much." To which I confidently responded... "he adores me!"
After this encounter, I vividly remembered the first Time Mr. Petals did voice this.
I was pregnant for our first son and i thought labor had begun. The dr. said to come straight to the hospital to get checked because that's where he already was. It was a sunday and it ended up a false alarm. I apparently apologized more than a couple of times for bothering him unnecessarily. When he left the room, my husband yelled, 'WHY are you apologizing? He is your Doctor! This is what we've paid him for! Stop saying Im sorry!!!"
A few days ago, a dear friend pointed out to me that it's not so much that I'm insecure as I am very compassionate and kind and use "I'm sorry" to be tender. I also sometimes use it instead of an 'excuse me' as I did one of the times in front of Mr. bold, when I thought I got in some ones way.
I don't know why I am having a difficult time getting this out of my head. Did mr. bold mean to play mind games with me? Or Did he ever think twice about his insolent remark? Did he truly think he was in a position to be helpful? I really don't know. Maybe it wasn't a game at all and there is a reason for this as I think there is a reason for everything that happens. It HAS made me notice that I apologized to all of you in my last post, and today at work it made me stop myself a few times from saying 'Im sorry" to a few clients. Like, While brushing some ones face with the cape I was putting on them, I instead chose... 'OOOPS!". but is ooops better?? I think
sorry makes more sense. Maybe I think too much about too much?! Who knows! Maybe you know? I won't apologize for ThIS post as I did the last but can I say Thanks? Does that sound insecure too? Thanks for listening! Hope u leave your opinion, because unlike mr. bold.. this time I am asking for advice! :))
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11 hours ago