Saturday, November 22, 2008

A lucky lady's grateful shout-out

(hope you're listening to my synchronized song choice)




It's such a coincidence that Grateful is the prompt from Sunday Scribblings this week. A few hours ago I was just talking to a client about how grateful I am, for my husbands ways which I know were partly inherited from
his special dad.
One thing I've sadly found out through blogging is there are many readers who DON'T want to hear the loving, positive qualities in someone's loved one. They find it nauseating. I don't know what that means about that type of person, I really don't care either! If you are this type of person, Move on to the next blog on your reader, or You WILL throw up! I am not writing this for you. I am writing this for me. For too many years, I covertly avoided drawing attention to this side of my marriage. Partly, because I didn't want to sound like I was boasting, when Most of my girlfriends constantly complained that their husbands never did enough for them. I am finally wise enough to acknowledge and appreciate HOW lucky I am and That I SHOULD be shouting it from a freaking mountain top!

Through examples from his own dad and from the love in his own heart, My husband is one of the most considerate, giving husbands that I know of. I can't believe I used to find his considerateness sometimes embarrassing, sometimes silly. What in the world was wrong with me in my youth? The example I just shared today with my client was that When our kids were younger, If we all went shopping at the mall, I wasn't to carry anything, NOT ONE bag. Instead of being grateful and honored, i used to think he was being ridiculous. I'd protest and say.. I'm not an invalid, Let me have something. But he insisted and I'd let him have his way. My boys would chime in and say... 'MoM! we can handle it".
When my husband was a small boy he routinely witnessed the kind acts his dad did for his mother. One tale is..each time his dad took food off the barbecue He would first Go over to his wife's plate and give her the best of whatever he had cooked. The perfect pork chop. The steak cooked exactly to her liking. Then my father-in-law would give the kids the next best grilled food and lastly he took for himself whatever looked burnt or less desirable. My husband follows this exact ritual with us. He has so many selfless rituals of adoration and devotion. After 28 years of marriage.. He still gets to the car door handle before I can to open my door. He opens doors for me wherever we go together. He enjoys warming up my car before I go somewhere on a cold day. Almost every single morning, He carefully schedules his time frame that he needs to get ready for work, so that he can Take the 10 minutes and blow out my hair for me. I often joke that even Madonna mustn't have a hairstylist do her hair EVERYday! He tells me it's the best 10 minutes of his morning.
He helps cleanup dinner every night and makes sure our kids also lend me a hand. He helps me clean our home, NEVER wanting me to do the heavy jobs. There is not a day that goes by that he doesn't tell me a beautiful compliment. Most importantly, He always tries to make me feel valued and important. Everything he does, he does it with my best interest in heart and mind. Gratitude is not a big enough word to describe what's in my heart for my caring, sensitive husband, my best friend forever.
What I also adore about WHO he is, is that I know he is passing on these respectful, loving rituals to our three watchful sons. To this day,
Any time I am out shopping with one of my 2 younger sons, it touches my heart that they INSIST on carrying all of the bags for me. (my eldest is a rebel when it comes to bags) All three of them are gentlemen and open doors for not only me but for anyone entering with them. With the loving examples my sons have been exposed to, and the genes that I swear are partially responsible for this extraordinary reverence and admiration for women, I feel they are bound to also be the kind of husbands, who any smart, lucky lady would be so grateful to call hers.

25 comments:

paisley said...

well lucy,, as you well know,, i love to hear the tales of your love.. your husband is one in a million,,, and he chose you,, because he knew you would understand....

if it weren't for you and the story of your love affair with your darling husband,, i would have spent time eternal believing that there is no such thing as happily ever after.......

Skittles said...

I think we women bloggers find more camaraderie when we whine or make jokes about our husbands. (He has to let his ironed pants COOL?? :P)

Yet, it IS nice to talk about the good sides of our men from time to time, and you did a wonderful job in this post.

Genuine Gem said...

hey, i'm throwing up...LOL...just teasin'
I know what you mean. i'm deeply and hopelessly in love with my guy...when did that become a bad thing? when did we become a minority? Why is it people don't believe us?
Your guy sounds WONDERFUL and I'm glad you kept him :D

~TAMY 3 Sides of Crazy~ said...

You go girl - BOAST all you want because you are not only loved, but were also a party to raising more just like him!! I think I'm married to his brother (he does dishes and laundry too) LOL. It always makes me proud when one of our sons opens a door for me or does something kind and considerate - I see their dad in them every time and know they will make some lucky girl a good husband.

Blondie said...

This is a lovely post! I think one of the reasons the divorce rate is so high in this country is because people have become so self-centered and view marriage as a license to take their partner for granted. By treating you the way he does, your husband is ensuring that you will care for him and treat him well in return. I think even Dr. Phil would agree! If men want their wives to "stop nagging them" and "not be so bitchy," they should treat their wives with care and respect and consideration. The littlest things to them, mean so much to women.

I especially like that you recognize that your boys will benefit from your husband's example. You have much to be proud of...and grateful for! You are a lucky woman!

Blondie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Linda Jacobs said...

I hope you show this to him! It's beautifully written!

mspennylane said...

That is a lovely post. And what you say about your sons, I'm very sure that's true. My granny always says to me that you can tell how good a husband someone will be by how they treat their mother :)

Mistress Meeyee said...

Come and enter my giveaway! It ends tomorrow.

Giggles said...

My Darling friend I am sobbing tears of joy for you! For the beautiful man you have! Tears of grief that I treated my partner as such and it was never returned or acknowledged as it should have been. This is the most amazing post and I am so proud to call you friend. You are an inspiration for true love. I know why he treats you so well, because you truly deserve it! You were the perfect woman to have three boys, the world is a better place because of you and your man!

Love you tons...through all my tears
Sherrie

Granny Smith said...

Oh, I relate to this completely! My husband is like yours. And HE praises ME to other people!

Queen-Size funny bone said...

You are lucky and I envy you. just because others have not found the love of their lives there is no need not to congratulate someone who has. Now does he have a brother?

Queen-Size funny bone said...

it just came to me. we could all move to Utah and he could marry me too.

tumblewords said...

I love hearing happy stories! Actually, I am grateful for them (trying to stay in synch with Sunday Scribbling). It's great that the boys are learning such fine manners and kindness.

linda may said...

Lovely Lucy. He is certainly one in a million and together you are magic. It is a shame that not everyone is so well matched.
I adore my husband too but we have had a few rough times, particularly when he was younger. You see he was bought up without a Dad because he died young.Today he is thoughtful and loving.

forgetfulone said...

I'm not nauseated! I'm happy for you. You are one lucky lady who has a "grate" husband to be "grate"ful for! Anyone who has a problem with that is just jealous and needs to get over it. I'm so glad you have him! How very special he must make you feel.

Mimi Lenox said...

You have no idea how much I needed to hear this tonight. Thank you for extolling the virtues of the fine men (young and not-so-young) in your home. These qualities are hard to come by these days. You do, indeed, have much to be grateful for. Your descriptions of his small (HUGE) acts of love and kindness are incredibly rare. What a wonderful example your husband is setting.

Brava to the boys!

Devil Mood said...

On the contrary, Lucy, it is wonderful to read about such a great husband! It should give the rest of the world hope, at least from my point of view.
I was really impressed and I'm super happy that your kids are learning from that example, so I think you're right - they will be great husbands too.
By the way, that Bryan Adams song is one of my favourites :)

Anonymous said...

Anna said:

I enjoyed this post very much. As I am just as lucky with the man in my life. We just celebrated 45 years of marriage and he is always there for me and our family. When I hear women my age complain about their men I think wake up. In a moment one's life can change and I hope they will remember the good times.

Rambler said...

I am sure your sons would be really thankful for the lessons they are learning now

Chris said...

What a very very special man your husband is. It is not just about being a husband, though, while you are benefiting from his loving and giving ways, the world is too. Just imagine all of the good and loving energy this post has generated, and how all of us have been moved to try and be more like this.
Love to you all.

Bella Mocha said...

The boys in your life sound wonderful and very special- you have much to proud of! They must be as proud of you too though. It's lovely to hear such genuine appreciation...it doesn't always happen!
I'm so glad for you!

Lovely SS too...thank you!
Bella :)

Quin Browne said...

if they don't want to hear it, they don't love that person.



period.

rosey said...

I hope that one day I'll get married. If I do, I want a man like yours. Not yours of course, he's already yours if you see what I mean. And reading it didn't make me throw up.

Tammy said...

What a treasure he is Lucy! Not only do you get the benefit of a good man but so will the future spouses of your boy's. What a great example of a real man.

Someone is getting lucky after that! lol