3 days ago
Friday, November 21, 2008
Poor sweet Daisy
Every time I visit Queen-sized funny bone and see the photos of her adorable chihuahuas, my heart gives a tug. I think it's time I finally tell my Chihuahua story...
When I was a little girl I had an adorable chihuahua named Daisy. She was white like the one in this photo and shook like a leaf in every situation. She always slept with me and would stay curled up way down under the covers near my feet. I carried her around everywhere I went. When I rode my bike, I would plop her in the basket and make her sit down so she didn't fall out. One day, even though Daisy was staying like a good girl, I went over a bump in my street and POP, UP came Poor Daisy and BAM down in the street. I slammed on my brakes dropped the bike and ran to her in a panic.
She cried only a bit but I cried for an hour. I held her on my lap while sitting on the side of the road. I kept telling her "Im so sorry daisy" "Im so so sorry" "Are you okay girl?"As I pet her, I remember even bringing up to her, the time I took it upon myself to cut her black nails and I accidently made her bleed A LOT and I didn't know what to do, because no one was at home. I told her again now, HOW awful I felt about that time I hurt her nails and how scared that had made me too. I promised her I would never make her come for a ride again. I carried her back home and put her in her doggie bed. I went back and got my bike and put it away. I pulled myself together, not an easy task for an eight or nine year old. I never told my Mom what had happened that day.
A few weeks later, Daisy was acting strange. Every-time she would make one little move, she would start yipping. It was so scary and I was so sure it was from the fall. Still, I didn't confess. Reluctantly My mom took my little Daisy to the vet. The news was just horrifying. Poor Daisy had a slipped disc in her spine and would have to be put to sleep. I'm sure the vet must have suggested back surgery, but that scenario was never told to me. I had to say goodbye to my sweet little girl, who I loved with all my heart. The grief combined with the stabbing guilt I felt was simply unbearable. I cried non-stop for more than a week. My family was supportive at first, but after a few days.. they thought there was something very wrong with my never-ending grieving.
Till this day, my heart pangs everytime I think of her. Thankfully as an adult I let go of a lot of that guilt. I was a little girl, with very little supervision. Daisy's injury could have been avoided, had I been told NOT to put her in that basket. Good judgment doesn't come so easy to a child. I silently carried the pain in my heart for this little dog for so many guilty years. Confession feels so good, no matter how many years it's been. She will never be forgotten and I will never stop feeling this deep remorse for shortening her sweet,precious life.