stressed out

The last few weeks have been a killer on my IBS. I wish I could handle stress better. I've read enough articles, web pages and books all with wonderful advice, yet It seems I just can't change.
My middle son has been suffering terribly with his allergies, asthma and most recently sinuses. The CT shows polyps in the sinuses and the ENT recommends surgery. I am just not comfortable with this ENT, So yesterday we saw someone for a second opinion. He agrees, surgery will help but guess what.... He doesn't do this type of surgery. So why the hell were we referred to him? In the middle of all this, my youngest son is now afflicted with the same problems as his brother. His asthma used to only kick in when he was sick, but now It's been very bothersome. He has missed too much school. We've been through more doctor app'ts and medications and treatments then I care to disclose. It's tiresome and worrisome and I've just about HAD it. When I'm not sitting with them for hours in different doctor offices, I am on the phone with the insurance co. or different specialist.
To add more stress to a mom about to jump off a F___ing bridge, my middle sons pcp( or ASSHOLE as I've named him) tried giving me a hard time about writing a referral to the 2nd opinion ent. The Explosion his secretary received was heard for miles. With all this poor kid is going through, he expected him to come see him AGAIN, before he writes the stupid referral?
I accused him of only wanting a co-payment and that I would personally walk it into him but my son is NOT coming in to a needless doctors app't. Long story shortened- He has a new Pcp, and that first one should be ashamed to have taken the hypocratic oath.
During all this, my oldest comes to visit with a surprise..... he got a tattoo. This made me cry as I thought about how carefully I took care of his little body when he was a baby and Now it's tarnished with ink. He also tells of how he was HIT by a cop car while biking the night before he came home! HE is mostly fine, thank god, but I was so upset to hear this too.
If THIS isn't enough to put my bowels through hell and back, On Memorial Day my youngest was obligated to march in the parade with his school band. I forbid him to go, since he was on a nebulizer and couldn't breathe. According to the schools web info, If it was the first time you miss a marching band commitment you just need a note to the head music director. NO problem, I wrote a nice informative note. yesterday his band teacher doesn't bother collecting the note just screams at him that he couldn't have been too sick if he was there the next day and says he is losing 15 points off his grade this quarter.
If you have never seen a half sicilian, 5 ft. tall, Crazy woman with smoke coming out of her every orifice... You should have been at my house yesterday. Wish I had pictures to depict the amount of insanity that was surging inside of me. Thank god I don't have a weapon in my home. My stomach was in total knots when I couldn't immediately reach her or her supervisor.
Of course, when did they call me back? SURe, when I was at the 2nd opinion ENT's office. Even though I went into the hall to explode, my son claims EVERYONE in the waiting room heard me and thought I was a crazy woman. Oh well. If A momma protecting and advocating for her kids is wacko , I am a going to soon need a straight jacket.