To hope. To dream. To imagine.
In 2009, I had hoped to change my families futures.
I had a dream that I could make it happen.
Recently, I imaged a wonderful idea for an invention.
I shared it with a friend, who also got revved up and wanted to be
We researched the concept and happily found out it didn't already exist.
So, I planned and I worked hard and I sought out sound advice. I kept my idea
protected like a precious newborn baby. I began to excitedly carry out my idea.
I spent many hours thinking, creating and bringing my vision to life.
Just yesterday, new years day, as I was on a passionate role, just as I could visualize
it all panning out, all the pieces falling together, my son made a devastating discovery.
My unique idea had already been put into action. Executed by another, a few
short years ago. My poor son came to me with a grief stricken expression and such a heavy heart, that I was preparing myself to hear news of someones death. His news did affect me as if someone had died. I feel i am in mourning for my hopefulness. For my imagined dream. I was never very skilled in computer research, but would have never imagined how much that shortcoming would cause such heart break. Even though ultimately my dream included riches for my family, my dream was also a desire to prove to myself that I could accomplish anything I put my mind to, a dream to make a difference in the world
Like the time it takes to heal after any type of grieving, I am so hoping in time, i can imagine and find passion for another idea that would give me that desired feeling of making a difference. I will dry my tears, put on my big girl panties and optimistically believe, I am no poorer for this crushing upset, I am in fact richer. Rich With wisdom, with growth and like a dear friend pointed out, with inner strength, that just like a good cup of tea, grows only stronger in hot water.
(my computer crashed yesterday,so i am sharing someones. If I dont reply to your comments and emails for a while, please understand)
19 hours ago