Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Another superb day in Suburbia

Do you remember that 'curb your enthusiasm' episode, where Larry David had a doctors app't at a specific time, but the office took patients in the order of who signs in first?? I love that show because He shows the stuff that happens to me ALL the time, and He makes me feel I am Not alone for getting peeved at this stuff. It's one of the reasons, Seinfeld is my favorite show too.
My day today contained 2 more scenarios, PeRRRfect for Larry's next season of CYE.
My husband had a 2 pm Dr.'s app't to have the Smoke Cessation procedure but first we had errands to do. Our first stop this morning.. The Library, to return books and a movie and Pick up books on hold. My husband is waiting outside in the car. NO one is at the counter so I walk right up. The librarian sees me waiting. I have my card out and my books out of my cute bag and ON the counter. She doesn't acknowledge me with a "be right there" just eye contact. AS she walks towards me, she veers off and becomes obsessed with a fan that's oscillating . She wants this fan to stand still. Apparently, The movement didn't bother her until she sees me! So she is talking to another woman down the other end of the other counter... she is saying.. "I wish I could make this fan stand still". I felt like I was in a freaking candid camera episode. She FINALLY comes to me, checks IN my stuff and she observes that the movie I returned was ON Hold for a library employee next so she STOPS checking me in and turns to look for Betty.. "BEtty, Betty.. LOOK you get to see the bucket list tonight!" Then she needs to walk away to get the new books that are on hold. I sWEAR I am NOT making ANY of this up...AS soon as she turns away from me...Instead of walking to the shelf where held books are.... She STARTS messing with the FAN again!! Is It just me? or is this just ridiculously inconsiderate?? It's also another example of me being TOO nice! LARRY wouldn't have just stood there right?? What I love about him is He SAYS the things I am thinking but feel would be too forward to say. He may have said 'Don't you think you can help me first, and fuck around with that fan on your own time?? That's what I felt like saying! FInally I get to leave the library and the wacky fan lady.
NeXT STOP- home depot. After waiting on a short line for only about 5 minutes, It's my turn! Wow! this is too good to be true! NOT! AS Soon as she scans my item, The cashier next to her ( who is helping the guy who wAS BEHIND me on line) Is needing my clerks help for every freaking button he needs to push. She no sooner goes back to my return and another employee needs paper work from my girls tool belt thingy. WE are ALMOST getting there (of course the other guy is already done) Just as she is ready to count out my money? HeR PHONE rings! I didn't do a Larry but I did mumble vaffanculo under my breath.(I am not bilingual, I just know a few italian curses) The rest of the errands went fine UNTIL at 1:50 when we arrived at the dr.s for his 2 pm appointment, He signed in AFTER a woman who wrote 2:20 on the sign-in sheet as her appointment time. YEP... they took her in first! Like Larry argued- WHAT is the point of the appointment if it's on a fist come first serve basis?? Shouldn't they say... Come in when ever you want, sign in and wait?? (After all, As Jerry has said- 'That's why they call it the waiting room.") So, tell me please... What DO YOU say in these types of situations?? Are you a patient waiter? do you speak your mind?? Or are you A seether who mumbles?

Here are some other fun italian words for you in case YOU are the latter and need to mumble something subtle under your breath-
'stronzo', 'Bastardo', 'puttanesco', 'rompicoglioni', 'figlio di puttana'= They sound so lovely, No? translation?
turd ,bastard ,whore, pain in the ass and of course the ever popular 'Son of a bitch.'


Queen-Size funny bone said...

I have a few more italian curse words if you need them. I need to send you some bitchy pills. I not only would of told her what i think but i'd also write a letter.

Forgetfulone said...

You have got to be kidding me! I would have said something. I don't know what, but it wouldn't be nice. You know how you're waiting in line at the grocery store, and when it's finally your turn, you realize why it took so long, because the checker and the sacker are more concerned about gossipping about whose doing what with whom? If they would just be quiet and check me out, I would be happy. I've been tempted to say something before because heavy sighs don't send a message strong enough for them to interpret. Oh well.

At my library, we have a hold shelf. We walk over and get our holds, then we go to the self-service checkout and we're done. And to return books and movies, we drop them in a slot. Very convenient!

threesidesofcrazy said...

I used to be just like you - I swear you described my day to a tee! Now I'm somewhere between you and Larry. I always try to remember what my dad taught me when I was little, If you have something negative to say always start with a positive so you have their attention. I recently had a similar situation at Walmart return desk. The ENTIRE transaction took place without her uttering a SINGLE word to me. But she did speak to EVERYONE around her and taking time from what she was doing for me to help the other cashiers who were helping people from the line behind me. I was going to say something to her, but it was like a challenge to see if she was ever going to acknowledge me. All the while I'm staring at her name tag that says "Courtesy Associate" on it - you have to be kidding me? Anyway, I did stop and speak with the store manager saying something like, "I knew you'd like to know that while my return transaction was handled properly, it was not handles courteously" and then explained what transpired to him. You know what he did - he actually pulled her off and spoke with her! I was so surprised. I said something to him to make me feel better and my seething go away never truly expecting anything to come of it. I guess dad would be proud I tried his positive spin thing and it worked. LOL Then there was the time the cashier gave me a lecture on buying products from another specific country... so to answer your question I NOW speak up, but do it as nicely as possible trying to give the benefit of the doubt.

daisies said...

i am a patient waiter, seething inside though i must admit that every once in a while, i lose my cool and say something but i always feel badly afterwards, cheeks burning red .... sigh. i need a course in how to be agressive because i am sure they see me coming and just know they can walk all over my kindness, sigh.

sorry this happened to you!! xo

paisley said...

i rarely bother with them,, as i have come to realize the only one that cares if i am upset is me... but i love to watch others when they go off on each other in such instances,,, even better if they are cussing them out in italian!!!!!!!

Granny Smith said...

I'll add those curses to the ones I know in Portuguese. Just think! Trilingual cursing!

I've left a little something for you on my blog.

Anonymous said...

Anna said:

Sounds like a typical day in the neighborhood, ha ha. What I'm most impressed with is how much Italian you know.