Monday, September 08, 2008

I got hammered at work

I feel like this is going to sound so bitchy, but I am going to write it anyway!
I attract LOONIES!
Today was just one of those days. THREE loonies in one day! I feel like I am going to explode.
I have spent a good part of today just being Hammered. That is the only way to describe it. Like someone is just hammering me into the ground with their incessant, non-stop bullshit about Nothing! If you are a client reading this Please don't think I am talking about You! If I gave you my blog address that means I actually talked to you! That means I like you. With These hammers, I, like any common head nail, remain VERY quiet in their company.(Quiet, but still professionally polite). When someone has something better to say about EVERY freaking topic and they are authorities on EVERYthing and they interrupt others and just have to hear themselves speak- I don't try to OUT-talk these people! I just do my job, cut and color and blowdry their hair and take the hammering while quietly imploding. Besides torturing me, I feel most awful that these narcissistic clods are torturing my other NON-hammer clients. It's truly bad for business. To be subjected to an annoying hammering just because you happen to have an appointment at the same time as one? I have actually had some of my NON-loons (who thankfully most of my clients are) BEG yes BEG me... "PLEASE, don't book my appointment at the same time as that Nut ever again! But, seriously, like I just said recently to a non-loon that I really like,-"that would be so difficult for me to remember, it's just not possible". So she replied, "DON'T worry, I will never forget her(the hammers) name, I will remember to ASK you if she will be there or not, and if she is, I would wait a whole week to see you, rather than be subjected to her"!! THAT should give you an idea of HOW Loony these loons actually are!! I KNOW I've been more intolerant lately than ever before, but seriously.. It's NOT just my perception!

Of course, who gets the brunt of my frustration? Poor Mr. Petals. I met him for a lunch break today and I was cursing my head off! I was also questioning, WHY? WhY do I have so many fucking loonies?? AM I a loony too? Is that why? After my enraged rant was over, he very sweetly said to me.. "Most loonies aren't welcome in too many places, You are so kind to those whack jobs, thats why they like you and come to you. YOu make them feel like they can be themselves, where so many other hairstylists would be really rude to them". So how does that theory make me feel?? I really don't know! Maybe, like a moron? WHY do I have such a difficult time being honest if being honest will hurt someone. Even if that someone is an obnoxious, Ball Pein hammer!(or more apropos- pain in the balls)
It's not just because I am fearful of losing their business meaning earning less money. It's because I think that One unkind word can wound someone for their lifetime. Don't get me wrong though! I HAVE said some really awful things, BUT that usually ONLY happens to me, when someone gets nasty with me. I don't do well with nasty!!...

Years ago someone sent their Aunt in to me who had been in the hospital for a long time and needed a cut. AFTER I got done washing her hair, she told me how good it felt 'cause she hadn't washed it for FOUR months!! I very nicely said, "ooh Mary, in the future I wish you would let me know that, I would have preferred to have had gloves on." AS NASTY as NASTY can be she snapped loudly at me- "WELL IT'S NOT LIKE I HAVE BUGS OR ANYTHING!!" So what did Sweet Lucy Petals reply?? Very calmly and professionally I replied "well, neither does Dog shit, but I wouldn't want to handle it"
I thought MR. Petals was going to explode from holding in his laughter! He COULDN'T believe his ears! He later told me HOW proud he was(and shocked!) that I had stood up for myself. BUT, unless my hammers become Nasty hammers... I fear I am stuck being an battered nail.


Giggles said...

Did I have an appointment there? I didn't think I had an appointment! This was an insightful post for me. I think there are times when people might feel I'm a know-it-all! Eeeks maybe I should work on that. She must be a Gemini....we are sponges for info....and love to share it. I learned something today....I REALLY AM A LOONY!! HAHAHA!! Sorry you have to deal with these people.....I think you should use the dogshit method on all of us!!

Love and hugs Giggles

Gill said...

Oh Lucy I sympathise!

Many moons ago, when I worked in a bank, there were a couple of looneys that would ask for me by name - one of them actually slapped another clerk who tried to deal with her (the clerk knew I was hiding away in the loo to try to escape the looney!)

I think the problem is that we are too kind, too afraid of hurting feelings. As I get older I am developing more back bone, but I'm still a looney magnet.

Love the dog shit comment!! Priceless LOL!

Gill said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Queen-Size funny bone said...

They make a repellent for loonies. You can buy it on QVC. lol you are much better than I. Me I'd be wearing a big ass button that said LOON FREE ZONE...

forgetfulone said...

Very curious about the deleted comment. do tell!

Bitch any time you like. I've felt in a rather gripy mood lately, too. It's been so busy at work, so busy at home, and seems aren't going according to "my" plan. I suppose that's the problem. My plan.

Anyway, I can imagine you feel like a loony-magnet right now, but that is because you are kind. Well, usually! I can't believe you told that woman you'd have worn gloves. That's priceless! Good for you! That's so darn funny! Hope your week starts to go better.

Anonymous said...

I understand!!! I have had those loons and they're parents!!! Home daycare sure brings in the nuts too and some of them, well I just look at their kids and have to wonder how the child lived to be 3 years old? Really? who are these people? I remember one kid was ALWAYS dirty, and his stuff was too...I asked the parent to clean his stuff and him before bringing him to my care because I have to keep sterile environment for the other children in my care. She was insulted that I would ask her to clean her kid more than once a week!! That poor kid! CAS was I hope they did something for that boy!
Just a side note: If I were you, I'd always wear gloves! LOL...I know, I'm paranoid! lol

Anonymous said...

yes, i'm back...first, you changed your profile picture!!! fabulous!!! you look great!!
2nd...go cool your pants...ROFLLMHO...that's hilarious!! I think I'll tell my Hubby that just to let off steam, he's peeved me off today! augh...something stupid of
3rd where I come from, hammered means blitzed, sloshed, I am thinking you were completely drunk and cutting crooked...LOL

Tammy said...

First, I talked to you that night so I guess I'm in the looney club. LOL You are a sweet thing so of course us loonies are attracted to you. LOL

Second, I will admit I love the hair and those are your sassy eye's but that signature smile is MIA. Can we scroll down? lol

Great shit comment. XXOO

paisley said...

don't feel bad girl... i have threatened several times to get "freak magnet" tattooed on my forehead!!!!!!

Christine said...

I am always grateful that these people are not in my family. Can you imagine if that were your mom, or even mother-in-law? My guess is their family won't have much to do with them so guess who gets the treat? Sorry it has to be you!