Happy Damn Halloween

Halloween used to be one of my favorite holidays. Back in the day when hulk (with the bad cold) was about 5 and the sweet befuddled clown was under 2. I Loved making home made costumes. Quite a stretch for me, since I don't sew on a machine. A lot of things got stapled and taped together. I loved trick or treating with the kids, carving pumpkins, baking orange treats.
I loved being able to make costumes representing what the boys really loved. Like when they were into batman, but both preferred being Robin.
No need to fight guys, You can both be Robin. I loved hunting for the clothing or items I could miraculously turn into a super hero or villain. Like the year my oldest wanted to be Captain Hook, I found a perfect red dress on sale at Lerners. It had buttons up the front. I changed the buttons to large gold ones. I hand sewed white ruffles around the edges. I wish I could find a picture to show you, I remember being so proud of that costume. Something happened to me as the years went by. Slowly, year after year, I started dreading then hating Halloween. Maybe it began when my oldest wanted to go out alone. Maybe, it was the fear of my kids getting hurt, or running into trouble makers.
Maybe it's because in my neighborhood the kids began asking for More candy and not even saying " trick or treat" or "thank you". Maybe, it's because I am just an old grump.
What ever it is, I have been trying with the help of a pal, to get back in the spirit.
My friend Jenny LOVES this holiday. (spinningspiderjenny.blogspot.com) Just hearing her enthusiasm has made me try to be a little more zealous. I am actually going to dress up this year to hand the candy out to the little bastards. I am going to be Mickey Freaking Mouse. I actually helped my youngest Carve the pumpkin this year, instead of just throwing it on the porch. Unfortunately, He doesn't have the fun early childhood memories of halloween that my older kids have. After all, he is 8 years younger than my oldest. So when he was about 4, that was when my halloween resentment began. The poor deprived kid. As you can see from the following photo of him, my creativity went kaput. Being a ninja, meant wrapping a long sleeve, black t-shirt around his head and calling it a day.

Champagne Anniversary!

This year is my Champagne Anniversary!
Never heard of that? Neither had I. Three of my friends who are sisters ( and fantastic women ) told me about this. A champagne anniversary is when the date of your anniversary matches the years married ( the 26th of Oct. and I am married 26 years) These girls were so funny, As they were explaining to me what this is, they became so excited when they learned that mine was this year! I have asked SO many people if they knew of this tradition and NO ONE has. I think, maybe, you girls made this up to have an excuse to celebrate in a bigger way. Maybe, seduce the husbands into better presents? GOOD IDEA LADIES! It is a lot of fun ( just like you). My husband and I don't really care for Champagne and being on weight watchers ( I lost another pound this week)! I think we will be celebrating with some lite ice cream! Ooooooh la la !

The first photo is early on in our dating. I am guessing it's from May of 1976. The next one- you've got it! October 26th 1980.

Petal update

Since I am not a daily blogger, I thought I should update some topics I've touched on. This week, things are calmer than last. I am so relieved that I got to visit my injured son. He is doing okay. In spite of the pain, he is trying to continue his life without much down time. He lives with such nice friends, who help him get dressed, tighten his brace and help him cook. The night he called me from the E.R. my youngest son was having his birthday celebration. He had 15 kids here. Inside, outside, skateboarding , video games and the dreaded Man hunt. I was busy jumping from window to window, to downstairs in the rec. room, making sure things stayed calm. Of course, when the call came in from My hurt son, I was away from spy duty. Wouldn't you know it, a father comes to pick up his daughter a few minutes after my emotional distraction. I run downstairs to the main party area, NO daughter! I go to the back yard where kids are on the trampoline, No daughter. I yell for my son, who says she took a walk! Holy Shit! I mean she is only 14 years old. Aren't I responsible for her? Why the hell would she walk away? I have to return to the door to tell this very protective father, that his kid is not here! You can't even imagine the look on his face.( i keep thinking I am going to hear from his attorney!) It ended up that she decided to walk home,which is not far, but still this is 10 p.m. and she didn't tell anyone where she was going! My husband and I start arguing, (because he just hates it when i am beating myself up!) He is like, "they are 14- You can't possibly just sit and watch them all night. She shouldn't have done that!" Thank god nothing had happened to her, because come on guys- No matter what she did, I still argue- "She is my responsibility, when she is at my home!" On top of this stress, I am still upset and wanting to drive 3 hours to be with Mr. bike accident. Again, the husband disagrees and tells me to "calm down" and "think things through". I always say my kids would still be in diapers if they didn't have a dad.( Needless to say- that will be the last party my son has until high school graduation.)

Another update- if anyone read about my mom ( a few posts ago). Well, she is recovering from knee replacement surgery. She is doing super. Of course, they are giving her the v.i.p. treatment, due to her dedication in volunteering at that hospital. I pray the rehab isn't too painful.

As for the weight watching progress. The first week I lost 3.4 lbs! It was so exciting, and It was difficult. So difficult that the 2nd week, I just couldn't be as strict and I gained a couple of ounces. Hell, With all that was going on, what with missing kids, injured kids, and birthday cake, I guess that wasn't too bad. This week I am kind of sort of back on track again, but still craving massive amounts of sweets. I baked the w.w. recipe for cupcakes. It was actually delicious. But who can stop at 1 or 2 cupcakes. Also, they reminded me of yankee doodles sans the cream, so i have discovered shoving the whipped cream nozzle in them and giving a good squirt is doodley delicious! To make them all you do is combine a chocolate cake mix with 15 oz. of canned pumpkin and a 1/4 or so can of water. Bake for the time the box says for cupcakes. (anti- pumpkin people-) It doesn't taste like pumpkin at all. Don't forget the ready whip! ( they are 2 points without the cream!)
So that is the latest in my world, hope you share your thoughts with me.

heartache

This poignant quote is by Author Elizabeth Stone- Making the decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body.
Every Mother can relate to this. We Feel this. We live this. Our children call us "over protective", they think we are "crazy" and we "worry too much". Until they feel the heart tearing state of mother hood, they will never know how right WE are.
Last night I got a call from my oldest son. From a stretcher in an emergency room. Delivered there by ambulance. 3 hours away from me. Only a mother reading this passage can imagine ( or maybe unfortunately, remember) the heart pounding emotional despair you experience. Thank god, he is okay. He had a bicycle accident and has a broken collar bone. He is banged up and bruised. He is hurting. I have never had a broken bone, but I can't stop feeling his pain. I want to bring him home, nurture him, hug him and make sure he heals quickly. But I can't force my motherly urge on him. He wants to continue on his own. He is after all a man now. He is comfortable in his life.He is many miles away from me. Compassion cuts like a knife. I need to see him and hold him and know he is going to mend. I need to visit him. I need to be with my heart again.

here I go again

I finally joined Weight Watchers! Again! This is my 3rd "official" time. Lord knows, in between I've followed the program on and off without the meetings. Back in '96 ( wow, I can't believe 10 yrs. ago) I reached my goal and actually kept it off for at least 5-6 years. In 1988? around there, I also reached goal and kept it off a few years. You would think I would be a lifetime member? Nope, foolishly, I never did the little it takes( i think attending meetings for 6 weeks?) to achieve that status. So here I go again. My eating habits have slowly gone back to all the wrong ones. I've stopped exercising all together. I haven't even been for the "walks on the beach" that I so falsely talk about on my profile. I have strayed so far from the "healthy me", I'm not sure I've got it in me to be her again. I used to do intense work outs at a gym. I used to do Kick boxing. I used to love weights. Who the hell was that woman? I don't think I can ever get back into that kind of shape. First off, I feel old and tired ( all the time). gee, you think it's the extra 20 lbs. doing that Second, I feel like I don't have much free time lately. hmmmm, Maybe too much time writing about nothing on the ole' blog and finally ,third- I LOVE TO EAT! ANYTHING I LIKE! ANYTIME I WOULD LIKE TO~!

This is only day two of the diet and I am feeling very weak.( not in the "I'm going to faint" sense, in the sense that I may fucking blow this already) I am Very hungry. I really would like a cookie. I seem to remember W.W. giving me more points last time I followed it. I only get 20 measly points a day! In case your not one of the millions who know about this diet, let me give you an example- A bagel
( something I am longing for) the delicious type from the bagel store?? Its SIX points! Smear that with scallion cream cheese and I can probably call it a fucking day! I made the mistake yesterday of wasting TWO whole precious points on a half cup ( do you realize how small that is) Of disgusting cottage cheese w/ pineapples, that I thought looked good. I should have stopped after one nasty bite, but i was starving, I tell you!

I'm hoping that at the next meeting, I can ask the lecturer about the secret foods that I know she knows about, but she is holding out on me. Lifers have tried everything and know what shitty artificial butter substitute tastes less like plastic than the others. They know which ice creams and cookies don't blow your points and won't blow you up with gas. They know how to make mashed potatoes by rubbing two spuds together. I remember there were tricks. ( just not a whole lot of real treats )

The one thing I am happy about, about doing this diet, AGAIN, Is that I joined with My husband. It's the first time we are going together. I am going to look at it, as time together. A night out.( a date) Hopefully, we will help each other.Hopefully, We will have some laughs. Hopefully, we will enjoy new acquaintances. Hopefully, he will smuggle snicker bars in his pockets.

skin

Okay here we go- I have wanted to participate in
Sunday scribblings for a long time. I'm worried that I won't know how to link correctly. This very clever blog, gives you a weekly suggestion of a topic you can blog about. This week it's skin.
Many things come to mind but I'm choosing to talk about feet. Yes, feet. (As frightened as I am to have you realize - I AM A NUT.)
So many people are walking around on hard, calloused feet. I envy them their freedom to go barefoot. To use this skin like a pair of comfortable, broken in shoes. But it's still part of your body. I am obsessed with caring for my feet. I Never walk barefoot outdoors. It looks so easy and comfortable. i've tried it. I am instantly discomforted. I need to run for the foot cream. Yes, not hand cream- I have found the Best foot cream after trying many.( Gold Bond Foot cream) After standing up all day at work, I can't tell you how dry my feet are!
( i can't stand that feeling) I think standing makes them dryer than normal. First, when work is done- I can't wait to wash my hands. but next, the feet.
( still not sure i am a looney?) My favorite treat is when my husband rubs them for me. usually I am lucky enough to have this amazing, sensual foot massage a few times a week!( ahhhh haaa! that's why we've been married so long!) His routine is to start with Johnson's baby oil gel ( i like the lavender scent). He massages that in first, then comes the gold bond foot cream. He knows my favorite pressure points. He has many stress relieving manipulations. My feet seem to control my well being. Just like a glass of fine wine can mellow & relax, calm & sedate you. A foot massage does that and more! It is also an intimate bonding, a time for closeness. Akin to holding hands or cuddling. The loving act of massaging my stressed little toes is definitely comparable to foreplay.
(okay, this is sharing way too much on the ole' blog! ) As weird as I am about keeping the feet sweet, I was very perturbed when a client noticed my "un" calloused heals and commented- Oh my god- how come your feet are so smooth. I was in sandals and I thought " Jeez,why are you looking at me so closely lady??" My feelings surprised me, I am usually not so easily ruffled. maybe all these loving foot massages are making my feet taboo! They're for his eyes only. NAH! I was just in a bitchy mood!