Wednesday, March 31, 2010

knock three times

If you've read my blog for a while, you're probably aware that I was having these STRANGE dreams. I called them my 'baby dreams'. I am always forgetting about taking care of a baby child or even a baby dog. I received SO many thoughtful, detailed comments trying to help me decipher these crazy dreams... well, last nights dream has these BEAT! Literally! I am almost embarrassed to share my bizarre, horrible dream! Does it indicate that deep down , I am a dark psycho killer??
or should I call myself a cockapoo killler??? I don't think even Dr. Phil could help me Decipher this one! My sweet beautiful cockapoo Molly (who I adore! I swear to you, I adore her!!) was in a Huge pot of soup and I was... well ...trying to kill her in there! ALL of a sudden it dawned on me, that this may be TOO painful of a way to die (boiling??!!) SO I take my favorite soup ladle and start Beating her on the top of the head with it!
OMG!! I am hysterical laughing even thinking about it again! It's so funny, but It's also SO WACKY. I was so upset by it, that I awoke( before she was totally dead,) in a frightened state!!
I stumbled out of bed and told my dream quickly to mr. petals. His eyes bugged out and he laughed and said.. YOU are CRAZY! My kids are still laughing and every time Molly gets under my feet today they yell... hey Mom... Hit her with your ladle! Which made me realize, that may be the association between her and the pot of soup... she is ALWAYS right under my feet when I try to cook, waiting for the clumsy chef to drop a carrot shaving or a piece of chicken, but seriously what is up with trying to knock her repeatedly over the head with a ladle??

Monday, March 15, 2010

Did u ever?

Who knew I was feeling so hurt? It has been years since I dwelled on our lost friendship, Although fond memories of it do pop into my head at times. We started out just being two moms who had kids who loved to play together. With each play date, our friendship grew closer and closer. Soon the play dates with our two kids graduated into blended family functions, holidays and fun outings. I felt closer to you than to my own sister. As our kids grew they branched out and made more friends in their own schools, acquired different interests, desired to see each other less and less. I can't believe that that fact alone would sabotage the 'sister' hood that we had formed.

Apparently, it must have been me.. must have been something else that made it easy for you to stop treasuring a friendship that I thought we were so lucky to have found. I remember calling you weekly to chat and chat we did! but it soon dawned on me that you were never calling me anymore. So, I called less often. I'm proud of the fact that I'm pretty perceptive...I knew a 'brush off' when I felt one. I vowed to myself that I would stop calling and just see how long it would take for you to call me. The call never came. I'm not sure on the time frame.. but I am going to guess that about EIGHT years went by! I don't remember what sparked the impulse.. but I decided to call you one day.. We caught up on life, the kids, work. You sounded so truly happy to hear from me, promising to keep in touch. I am going to guess that conversation was about..... hmmm? I am thinking 2004?? Six years ago? I remember telling my husband that If you weren't being sincere, You deserved an academy award for your genuine enthusiasm and warmth!

I didn't feel as bad this time around when I never heard back from you, that is why I am so Surprised (and perturbed) at myself for feeling THIS wounded this week, when i got your request to be my friend on Facebook. I stared at your message and your image wondering if I should accept or ignore. I saw pictures of your beautiful children, who I had loved, all grown up.
I decided to sleep on it. I have to say, maybe I am being petty or overly sensitive, but I have decided to ignore this request. To me... your friend request is about 15 years late. You had a great friend, maybe you needed time to go by to realize how important that is, maybe you still haven't realized it. These 'friend' requests on Face book are commonly trivial and meaningless. After all this time... truly "friending' me, means picking up the phone or showing up at my door. Friending me on facebook... Feels SO hurtful and Confirms the fact that to you, I was merely the mother of your son's friend.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

hot tootsies pedicure

On Valentines Day my husband gave me a gift certificate for a fancy pedicure which they call 'The Anti-stress" pedicure! oooh la la!
Today I finally found the time to go enjoy it.. After I sat down and started up the back massager on the comfy chair, the girl took off my polish asked me to soak and then got up to put some green goop in the microwave. I opened up my novel and got ready to read and to relax and to DE-stress for the hour long procedure. Ahhhh, can't you just feel the tranquility?
All of a sudden, I SCREAmED! She applied this molten hot green lava to my right shin and I just about flung it in her face! As I screamed, I instinctively reached down and swatted it right off my shin and onto her apron! I then started splashing the tub water onto my scorched skin! Of course the poor girl felt so terrible and keep apologizing and of course I kept saying, it's okay, don't worry, it's okay... But BOY did that kill the ANTI part of the anti stress pedi! Afterward, I felt a bit tense with each sharp instrument she picked up and each spray of the hose that she gave me. When she went BAck in the micro to get the HOT towel, I swear sweat formed on my upper lip! Thankfully, she waved it around a bit before hugging it over my legs and feet! Over all, it was a wonderful pedicure and a beautiful gift, they may just want to give it a new name, my title would be my suggestion.

Saturday, March 06, 2010

Baloney fluency

For the Sunday scribblings prompt... fluent. I want to repeat an older story about HOW fluent I've become in the art of bull shit.
Usually, In my profession, no matter how you are feeling or what is going wrong in your life.. If you want to keep your clients coming back, you need to put on a happy face and listen to and respond to all the bullshit that some people need to talk about, with MORE bullshit. Although your head may be pounding or your heart aching or your nerves shattered, you need to make their visit all about THEM. Lucky for me that of late, I am not faced with this dilemma TOO often. Most of my clients are well liked and friends as well, and the conversations are really enjoyable, very honest and sincere . A normal exchange of interesting topics, as well as Me sharing my life with them and No bullshit what so ever!

Oh, But though those days, when I am faced with my most challenging clients.... the B.S., like green mold, just keeps spreading. Today (while covered in mold) I thought... It's peculiar, but they never touched on the art of bullshit back in beauty school. They did warn- "never talk politics or religion with your clients!" (they may have warned about sex talk too, but that's the best topic in my place) Yet, the art of bullshit! Which I think is AS essential for any successful hairstylist to know as good haircutting, needs to be self-taught. I've become QuiTe fluent in this art after all my years of experience. What you need is a harmonious blend of courtesy, combined with common-sense, combined with a Big-Phony-Baloney-sense (and a strong stomach too). If I were to establish and teach B.S. 101, it would include daring challenges like .. how to handle self-absorbed, narcissistic,loquacious, rude people, who will expect you to listen to endless chatter about How difficult it is to get ready for their much needed upcoming trip to the bahamas. I would also hand out garlic to chew and place my students in mock situations, demonstrating how a client may ramble on with pointless bullshit for 45 minutes (With foul breath) about their son in laws relatives being horrible with blow by blow accounts of EVeRy situation with these horrible people. People you've never met, never hope to meet and could really give a shit about! The student hairdresser would be required to stand there on their tired legs, looking interested, convincingly shaking their head in disbelief or whatever gesture is appropriate and interjecting B.S. expressions like "OH No!" and 'That's terrible of them". Thereby mastering the performance of an attentive, caring listener who can also implement the art of an excellent haircut, all while feeling totally irritated, trapped and nauseated by the odor with a longing to sit down and a desire to give their clients tongue a good trim as well. That's what I would call a B.S. Pro! give that student an A+!

Thursday, March 04, 2010

breakfast in america

If you're like me one of the things you love about your favorite lunch or dinner haunts, is that Fattening, delicious basket of bread they put on the table when you arrive! My favorite Italian place not only puts ROLLS on the table (and around my waist) But UNBELIEVABLY delicious Focaccia bread with Pizza sauce on it! I swear, I could make THAT my meal. After a few chunks of this warm cheesy,saucy, yummy bread... who needs to order?! (but I always do!)
The other Morning Mr. Petals needed to fast and go get some routine blood drawn, I offered to go with him for support. He asked "How about some pancakes at the diner afterward?" MMMMM I love breakfast out! but we rarely get the opportunity to enjoy that. So we both skipped breakfast at home, although, unlike him, thankfully, I DID get in 3 cups of coffee. By the time we got done at the lab.. I Was STARVING with visions of fluffy pancakes dancing in my head, It Dawned on me! WHY don't we get a yummy basket on the table at breakfast time too?? Wouldn't it be nice, if you sat down at the diner and while you were waiting for that griddle to do it's thing.. They had a nice basket of mini muffins or whole wheat toast at the table? ooooh... OR..what about a basket of Hash browns!! Mr. Petals liked the idea of a platter of bacon!
(how hungry is this post making u?) I ordered angel food pancakes with fresh strawberries on them and they were scrumptious and I WAS Extremely full afterwards even with out the muffin basket but I still LoVE that idea! what do u think? what would be in your ideal complimentary breakfast basket?