Monday, November 12, 2007

friendship

Thanks Writers Island. Your prompt this week was timely considering an hour before I looked to you for the prompt, I ran into my childhood friend at the Italian market. My friend only lives about 10 minutes from me. We still email occasionally.
We have only met a couple of times for lunch in the past 20 years. I sent her a birthday card just last month.
Yet, We were not only inseparable as children we were also blood sisters. Remember that Pre-HIV ritual that kids would partake in to confirm their bond of sisterhood? Linda and I met when we were in Kindergarden. Mrs. Woods' class. We didn't get friendly outside of school till the 2nd grade, when Our moms began working together and discovered their girls were in the same grade. We quickly became best friends as did our Moms. Each weekend I would sleep over at her house. She had the 'fun' neighborhood, full of kids around our age. Looking forward to each weekend helped me get through some difficult times in my own family life. In high school, I began living with her and her parents. My own Mom was going through some tough times and this arrangement made everyone happy. I don't know how it happened, but when I decided two years later that I wanted to move back home to my Moms home, everything fell apart. Linda's mom freaked out... calling me ( at only 16 years old) ' A fair weather friend'. ( They had had two deaths in their extended family). I was heart broken to lose my '2nd family' and more heartbroken to know that Linda was not suppose to talk to me. Even though she tried to respect her Moms wishes... In school during lunch period, we would try to chat and would think of ways to make things right again. When I looked back on this years later... I realized her Mom was going through her own traumatic difficulties which I know affected how she looked at the simple, harmless request of a child.
( I have a vivid painful memory of recieving the card I sent her for mothers day ripped into many pieces and mailed back to me) The trauma of her rejection added so much to what I was already going through at that time. And being an only child, I know this seperation was devestating to Linda. It is so unfortunate that we couldn't find a way to remain close friends. We went separate ways only a few minutes down the same avenue. Each time I see her my heart fills with warmth and it fills with a mournfulness over the wonderful times we missed out on in each other's lives.
I don't think we could ever be as close as we were as kids (for too many reasons too complicated to discuss) but like she said today to my 23 year old son whom she had never met before....." It doesn't matter how many years pass, each time we see each other I still feel like we're best friends". I love you Linda and I feel the same way about you. xo


Often when you've read about my childhood, you may remember...... Linda in the stories

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Lucy. Such a tender story to share with us. Years may give us better perspective, but the memories still sting.

Anonymous said...

Such a beautiful story, Lucy. I am so glad you still love each other dearly in spite of the separation. Thank you for sharing. Hugs.

Rambler said...

oh please keep trying, what you had was special, its really worth pursuation..

~Michelle~ said...

The way you phrased, "We went our separate ways only a few minutes down the same avenue," was exceptionally poetic and hearbreakingly beautiful.

Tumblewords: said...

A special story and one that resonates with me...strange how we drift apart because of others decisions. Nicely written!

Joan said...

It made me think. I've drifted apart from several important people in my life.

Keith's Ramblings said...

True friendship knows no barriers. Lovely story.

little wing writer said...

so many experiences for such a little heart...all grown up now..it is wonderful that she is still in your life...there are so many more tomorrows to come..beautiful...

awareness said...

I'm a firm believer in serendipity, and I believe you and Linda were given a wink from the cosmos bumping into one another this past weekend, and then for you to be given a chance to write about some of the big feeling stuff that wraps your friendship.

I hope the two of you take the next step together.....to seek and find closure in order to begin a new journey together would be a beautiful thing.

take care.

Giggles said...

What a heart rendering story. So sad, my heart grieves for Young Lucy and the ripped up mothers day card. Who could do such a thing to any young person that holds out a hand to love? That truly hurt my heart to hear. I believe Linda's mom may have been slightly emotionally immature. I've had kids stay and then leave to go back home as though nothing happened, and still my door is open to them with love! Big hugs for young Lucy and old Lucy! I hope that old bit made you laugh!!

Love Sherrie

daisies said...

thanks for sharing this special beautiful story, tugged at my heart honey, much love, xox

Unknown said...

I'm here, You never lost me Lu, I can't even begin to tell you all the tears that flooded my face as I sat here and read what you wrote about us. My heart has ached forever for I know that things could NEVER be what it was in the past. I truly do believe that things could be BETTER deeper, stronger, and I'm always and forever here for you, my sister that I have always had in my heart. You don't have to be related by blood to be family. Family is in our heart, and sister is in our souls forever! No matter where we are or how often we see each other, you will never loose me. We will always carry that one and only bond that we created 45 years ago. As for others this comment is not meant for anyone other that Lulu my sister always. But you are welcome to take a peek. God makes all things happen for a reason and although this is not a death, like quotes made by people who are trying to figure out why people loose the people they love, this time God has made it that we didn't loose each other, he made it that we appreciate what its like to have and to hold onto what we have. I thank him and Lulu for that. Now the tears are really flowing again and I'm gonna wake up with puffy eyes. Ok, I'm stopping now. I must say Good night and Tuesday is a special day in my life. It's your Birthday!! So, I will go until then, I Love You!