13 reasons JULY was awful

13 reasons why July has been the worst month.

1. My husbands company went out of business
2. They only gave him less than 2 days notice
3. When he went to cash his last paycheck, they had no funds available
4. I went through a health scare that took several tests and weeks before I knew I was okay
5. My cesspool backed up into my salon
6. My husband broke a rib
7. I broke my pinky toe
8. My middle son needed MORE toe surgery
9. We only got to the beach once
10. My dog hurt his toe
11. Another Fender bender
12. yeast infection!
13. Humidity + STress level = Bad temperments!

This is my 16th TT- visit Thurs. 13! for more

3 word Wednesday

TheThree word wednesday words are-

Gamble
Omitted
Temporary

It may be temporary but mention 'Gamble' and I become insane!
Thank god they've omitted casinos from any nearby town or lane
I can resist vices like alcohol, crack and pills
It's craps, roulette and slot machines, that give me crazy thrills!

Unconscious Mutterings.

This morning my husband and I set out shopping for a carpet. I can't believe how much time and energy I can put in to making the 'perfect' purchase. I should have my head examined. It is thundering and lightening, downpouring ridiculously, and we are driving all over long island for this damn perfect carpet. Do I go for the perfect size or the perfect color? Being a typical woman, How do I not go for a great deal? After tons of internet and catalog and now store shopping.. this is what it comes down to- perfect size vs. perfect color ( I CAN NOT have both) and both vs. the best price!
I couldn't wait to come home to a hot cup of tea and a dry set of clothes. Now that I've had both... I've made my insane but as always ambiguous choice... I am going for the perfect size which comes at a better price than the perfect color ( which I adore) This is for my salon... If you read a few posts back you know.. I am in desperate need of redecorating my salon. I totally fell in love with -

this carpet but it is a few inches too long and would mean having to have those few inches go under a wall unit, which would look weird and may make the wall unit off balance. So I went for size AND for a better price and went with this one -
As you can see by me writing about all this, I am still battling indecisiveness!
So now I am contemplating buying the first one anyway and using it in my house! What do you think of an area rug over a wall to wall rug?? I know it's done all the time, but I've never done that. (it may make vacuuming a bitch)
In the meantime.. I am happy to have an Unconscious muttering to take my mind Off the rugs until tomorrow, when i guarantee you I WILL make my husband totally Crazy! haha

1. Memory ::
Oh how I wish my memory would work

2. Original ::
My original brain seems to loose a little bit more space each year

3. Exclusively ::
I'm glad that I'm POSITIVe that I am exclusively the only wife my husband has.

4. Listings ::
I should begin listing all of life's events so I don't have to rely on this rotten brain

5. Bucket ::
Should I kick the bucket unexpectedly, I don't think my family would Know how to find ANYthING!

6. Knight ::
I woke up this morning to find my knight in cutoff t-shirt armor, had already cleaned the bathroom!

7. Dusty ::
He apparently didn't realize the dusty livingroom could have used the same attention

8. Choice ::
If I had a choice I would rather bleach the toilet bowl over dusting 5 thousand nicknacks too

9. Sunlight ::
The way it's raining right now, it feels like the world will never see sunlight again

10. Change of plans ::
We were going to go out to dinner, but all this rain has made us change our plans and opt for a pizza delivery.

Please visit Unconscious Mutterings for more word associations!

I'm going Home

(volume up, if you'd like to hear related music)




My solace is my home. No matter where I've been in my life, Home's the place I can't wait to get back to.
No matter how comfortable I am in someone's else's home, Walking into my own, always makes me take that cleansing breath and feel immediately more at ease. Maybe that is why I am a little bit of a 'homebody'. I'd choose relaxing on my messy cushioned couch, with my family, a good book,music, movie, notebook or board game over many much more exciting activities away. Part of the reason I find such solace in my home is because my loved ones live here too. My husband, my 3 sons and my 2 dogs. They are all a makeup of what my home means to me. My sweet husband has frequently melted me when he tells me that his drives home from work are so frustrating, because he too has such a strong desire to get home to our home quickly, he just can't wait to walk in the door and see everyone and be back in his solace haven.
Of course we all need some solace away from our loved ones too. On beautiful days, which lately we've had many of, I find that solace in my solitude outside in my backyard. The peaceful surroundings of tall trees which block out my neighbors yards, and the beauty of many different flowers, birds and butterflies ( can u see one in the righthand picture?).... allow me to get in tune with my inner thoughts, feelings and memories.
What a sweet word "home" is. It has always been a Word that brings my heart instant warmth. From my favorite line at the end of the wizard of oz- "There's no place like home" to Broadway's Beauty, Belle singing "my hearts far, far away, home is too". Remember when Diana Ross sang "When I think of home I think of a place with love overflowing."? That old song really moved me too. I feel, If You're lucky enough to have love overflowing at your home, how could it not be a soothing retreat, a peaceful harbor, Your sanctuary for ultimate solace. here are some pictures of my outdoor retreat.



(even my pets like my happy place!)

To find more solace.. hop over here

Friday fill in 82

1. I believe whatever doesn't kill you Better be able to run fast, If you've tried to kill me....well, RUN... us italians believe in revenge!

2. If you're good at something, Don't brag about it, but ..Pass it on, especially to a child.

3. Why so Self centered?? Let's all try to be more considerate of one another

4. Something is out there, it's Those Darn RAbbits! They are eating my vegetable garden

5. If my life were a sitcom, it would be titled... Where's Lucy? Oh yeah she's at the &%$#ing grocery store again, if you can't find her there check the torture chamber aka.... the laundry room okay that was my first reaction but I don't like sounding so hostile.... how about As the salon chair turns

6. Sitting on my back porch [if you don't have one, use your imagination] I see rabbits and squirrels and birds ( OH MY!) I also see all the beautiful Leyland cypress trees and perennials that my husband is obsessively planting each year, it really looks amazing and is so inviting and peaceful, My favorite spot!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to catching up on blog reading tomorrow my plans include Relaxing at the beach and Sunday, I want to Clean my house ( and probably will need to go back to the grocery store!)!

13 PERKS OF BEING OVER 50

Since I only have ONE more year until I hit the Big FiVe O
I've already searched the web for some of the advantages....


1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

3. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

4. Things you buy now won't wear out.

5. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

6. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

7. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

8. You sing along with elevator music.

9. Your eyes won't get much worse.

10. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

11. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

12. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

13. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

This is my 15th TT- visit Thurs. 13! for more

yulk!

TheThree word wednesday words are-

avoid
class
sticky

Early one morning I awoke to a sticky situation
A foul toxic smell caused me to avoid inhalation
An inch of dirty water in my salon is what I found
The Cesspool had backed up and erupted to higher ground
Ruining carpets, furniture, decorations and walls
frantically I woke and evacuated my family then made phone calls
to cesspool pumpers, insurance men & restoration crews
(Who surprisingly DIDN'T arrive clad in biohazard suits!)
A few young dudes in gloves, T-shirts and only shorts to cover their booties
Spent 6 long hours ripping rugs,cleaning puddles and contaminated doodie!
They left large bulky dryers & sanitizers buzzing for nearly a week
So, No work for me which sent my finances Literally up shits creek!
I guess There was no way for me to tell my funky sewage story without sounding quite crass
But with it's necessary renovations, I hope at least my new salon will have a bit more class

Mr. C.

This week sunday scribblings asks us "Do you believe in ghosts? Have you ever seen one?"

Many may answer these questions with- "There are NO such things as ghosts"! I, myself USED to feel that way too. I want to tell you a true story, A story that permanently Changed my feelings. After you read my story, The ABC's of why I believe, you most likely will still not believe in ghosts. I really think that unless you personally witness, as I have, an unexplainable, mysterious phenomenon; you are never quite open enough or brave enough to fully believe that GHOSTS Really, REalLY DO exist....

It all began one quiet friday spring morning in 1990. I had only Two little boys back then. They were playing together nicely as I did all my morning chores around the house. The phone rang, it was my dear friend Ann, she was very upset and having a difficult time trying to talk to me through her tears. I said "Ann, What is it? what's wrong?" She finally managed to say " Diana is talking to my father". Diana is Ann's daughter who at this time was only 3 years old. Diana had never been able to meet Ann's father before. You see... He had died a few years before she was ever born.
Ann begged me to come over right away, because her daughters bizarre behavior was 'just freaking her out". I packed up the boys quickly and drove the 30 minutes to where she used to live. When we arrived, things had calmed down. Ann wasn't crying and Diana was busy playing. My kids settled in with Diana and her toys and Ann explained what had occurred that morning right before she called me. She didn't have to explain for too long, because after a few minutes of chatting, Ann's father returned to the house and I witnessed first hand, covered in chills, why my sweet friend was feeling so ruffled.

Diana walked into her bedroom and started laughing and said "oh mommy, that silly man is back, He keeps saying he is going to get my nose!" (The game Ann had witnessed her father play with cute little kids her whole life) Diana continued, " He is so funny mommy"! Ann started getting upset but she said "Diana, tell me what the man looks like." MY goosebumps elevated to new heights as I listened to this sweet little girl describe Ann's father to a tee! Like the sweet thing she was,knowing it may not be nice, she shyly said
'He's got a big nose mommy!' Ann asked about his hair color and she replied it's black and curly like Aunt Lu's. I said to Ann... Do you have a picture of your dad handy? Show it to Diana. She ran to her bedroom to find a picture. I uncomfortably stayed in the pink & lavender frilly room with only Diana and the ghost of my dear friends father. Diana was still giggling and speaking to him, AND listening as well! I bravely lifted my hand and Waved towards the spot it appeared he was in and interjected with " Hi Mr. C. How have you been?" (pretty stupid question, don't you think?) When her Mom showed her the photograph, and asked " Does he look like this honey?" Dianas beautiful face came alive, her eyebrows raised with excited recognition and she replied, (with the innocent honesty of an angel),..."THAT'S THE MAN MOMMY, THERE HE IS! RIGHT THERE"! Don't YOU see him?" and she extended her outstretched arm and pointed finger towards the corner of the room.
All of a sudden Dianas happy face grew serious as if she was straining to hear him better. Ann asked "What's wrong ?" (I was just frozen silent with paralyzing astonishment)
Diana very slowly and seriously said,
"he wants you to know the baby is with him and he is taking care of her." Ann began tearing again and said 'WHAT, WHAT DID HE SAY?" Diana said, "he wants you to stop crying Mommy and to know the baby is safe. It's okay". I was a little confused until I remembered that Ann had told me that her first cousin had given birth to a still born baby girl the very week before. Ann's first cousin, whose godfather was.. Mr. C. He was trying to let the family know that the baby of the goddaughter he adored, was with him and being cared for. This had to be the reason for his visit.

My emotional sweet friend tried to gather herself and as she held on to me for (wobbly) support, Through her tears she told her father.... "I love you Daddy, go to the light, Go to the light!" ( later she told me, she remembered seeing something on tv about spirits needing to return to the light! At the time she watched it she had thought it was ridiculous)
Diana happily resumed playing with my kids for the day and never, ever mentioned seeing her grandfather again.

As much as I adore and love my friend Ann, I must say... I don't really know if that eerie days occurrences would have been quite as convincing and powerful if she would have only told me about them. I truly had to experience it with my own eyes to know....A.) Three year olds Could never be that accurately imaginative
B.) Especially when that three year old wasn't aware of the baby's death, Or of her grandfathers image and IS NOT Meryl Streep.. and finally C.) in the immortal words of the lovable cowardly lion....
Yes, I do believe in ghosts, I do, I do, I do, I do!!

(this is my son who was also 3 at the time of the occurance, I don't know why it's here,
he kind of looks like HE'S just seen a ghost! (If you turn up the volume, you will hear the song Ghost)

Friday Fill-In #81

1. If I could be a fly on the wall I would -- Listen quietly while watching out for swatters

2. Jealousy is--a great window, but an ugly and utterly unproductive feeling !

3. When I see a shooting star my wish would be that -- Others see it too so someone believes I actually saw one

4. I'd rather be on the beach than _in the never ending laundry room any day!

5. Certain songs when I hear them make me wanna Dance the night away! .

6. If time were in a bottle -- I would put the cork in tight and never let it be sipped away .

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to Finding new chairs for my salon on the web tomorrow my plans include sitting under my gazebo in the morning & sipping coffee with my husband while doing the morning cryptogram, then working my butt off all day. and Sunday, I want to _Totally relax all day while sipping WAY more coffee in the morn, then sipping up some sun in the afternoon then sipping my favorite Wine in the eve!! ( all this sipping is making me thirsty)

Stressed O U T

TheThree word wednesday words are-
history
narrow
spent



If I look back on the history of my adult life
It seems I've spent a wide amount of time
stressing over too many worries.
The big worries, like the health of my children and
my husband and my family and friends.
Or the smaller ones, like How do I pay these $#@* bills?
The stressFREE moments ARE there,
but it seems for only a narrow margin of the time.
Lately we are going through a series of stresses,
I keep telling myself, I've handled so many problems in
my lifetime, I CAN handle these too. Some days it's easier to convince
yourself. Some days it's just hopelessly impossible.

Unconscious Mutterings

1. Intimidated ::
often! But NOT deterred


2. Brush ::
Your hair before coming to me please...KNots are time consuming!


3. Masquerade ::
yourself as anything you want but when you look in the mirror you should like who you see


4. Procedure ::
If only I could begin the procedure of daily exercising


5. Tattoos ::
are too permanent for me. I can't even decide which pair of underwear to wear each day... If I ever got a tattoo... I would be sorry a short time afterward.


6. Square ::
I am really into square jewelry this year. Especially antique squares!


7. Tuck ::
I really miss the bedtime ritual of tucking in my kids.


8. Boyfriend ::
I once had a boyfriend who I thought I liked but everytime I kissed him I got nauseous.


9. Badass ::
He WAS a badass M.F., in a rough fraternity, tattoos too! haha


10. Thousand ::
I wonder what the world will be like in a thousand years?

Visit Unconscious Mutterings for more word associations!

my oldest friend

The song playing always brings her to mind.
I recently ran into my oldest childhood friend at the Italian market. My friend Linda only lives about 10 minutes from me. We still email occasionally.
We have only intentionally met up a couple of times for a lunch in the past 20 years. I still send her a birthday card each year.
Yet, We were not only inseparable as children we were also blood sisters. Remember that Pre-HIV ritual that kids would partake in to confirm their bond of sisterhood? Linda and I met when we were in Kindergarden. Mrs. Woods' class. We didn't get friendly outside of school until the 2nd grade, when Our moms began working together and discovered their girls were in the same Class. ( Mrs. Masucci's class!) We quickly became best friends as did our Moms. Each weekend I would sleep over at her house. She had the 'fun' neighborhood, full of kids around our age. Looking forward to each weekend helped me get through some difficult times in my own family life. In high school, I began living with her and her parents. My own Mom was going through some tough times and this arrangement made everyone happy. I don't know how it happened, but when I decided two years later that I wanted to move back home to my Moms home, everything fell apart. Linda's mom freaked out... calling me ( at only 16 years old) ' A fair weather friend'. ( They had had two deaths in their extended family). I was heart broken to lose my '2nd family' and more heartbroken to know that Linda was not suppose to talk to me. Even though she tried to respect her Moms wishes... In school during lunch period, we just had to sit together and chat and try thinking of ways to make our families bond again. As a grown woman, When I looked back on this entire situation years later... I realized her Mom was going through her own traumatic difficulties which I know affected how she looked at the simple, harmless request of a child.

( I have a vivid painful memory of receiving the card I sent her for mothers day ripped into many pieces and mailed back to me, MY mother declared her insane) The trauma of her rejection added so much to what I was already going through at that time. Linda, being an only child, was devastated by our forced separation. It is so unfortunate that we couldn't find a way to remain close friends. We went our separate ways only a few minutes down the same avenue. Each time I run into her my heart fills with warmth and it fills with a mournfulness over the wonderful times we missed out on in each other's lives and the lives of our children.
I don't think we could ever be as close as we were as kids (for too many reasons too complicated to discuss) but like she said to my son at that market recently about her oldest friend....." It doesn't matter how many years pass, each time we see each other I still feel like we're best friends". I love you too Linda and I feel the same way about you. ♥


If this sounds familiar I am reusing a story I wrote a few months back because it fit so well with the sunday scribblings prompt
Often when you've read about my childhood, you may remember...... Linda in the stories

I just came from Dianes blog where I found this great meme called Friday Fill-Ins
they give you part of a sentence and guess what? You FILL IN your answers! Great Fill in for thinking on my own! I LOVE it!
so here are this weeks....

1. Oh, I can't wait until I have a .... winning lottery ticket!

2. SKim Plus Milk..... is the first thing I see when I open my refrigerator.

3. I never leave home without My clothes on

4. If I were a condiment, I would be Ketchup__because _My husband is horse radish. .

5. ___ DISTRACTED DRIVERS is really high up on my list of pet peeves.

6. The last thing I thought of before I went to bed was what day is tomorrow? Do I need to set the clock?.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I’m looking forward to going to bed_, tomorrow my plans include working all day and collapsing at night_____ and Sunday, I want to Wake up real late and find out that #1 came true !

we need Marty Feldman eyes

Today while innocently out driving down my local, ever busier avenue, I couldn't help but notice HOW utterly distracted EVERYONE driving seems to be, ESPECIALLY the people driving BeHIND me! As everyone is going 60 mph, and everyone is starting to brake for the upcoming red light, I glance in my rear view mirror. MORE and more often, the driver behind me is tailgating at that speed, hasn't slowed enough for the upcoming red light and their heads are down looking at WHO the hell knows what! texting? dialing? zipping their pants?? Their eyes can't be on the road behind THEM, when they're not even On the Terrified motorist in FrOnT of them... ME! Two separate times today, I quickly moved to the left lane to give this type of distracted driver more stopping distance AND insuring that if he rear ends Someone, it won't be me! Don't you think this is putting a whole new spin on the task of 'defensive driving'? I find myself missing the days when most people were ONLY hot footed, impatient drivers. (like I still am!). Compared to these distracted speeder types, we are safer drivers! Remember how it used to be?
the red light turned green and Whewwwww the guy in front of you floored it. NOW... we need to beep to remind him to get his head out of his ass whatever he is busy with and just #$%@ MOVE!!
Please pacify me and take notice next time you are on the road.. Anytime you see a driver s l o w l y moving along, Or doing something dangerous or stupid... Peek in at him. Guaranteed his eyes or ears or hands are busy with another agenda. Driving is secondary.
Is there NO one in a hurry anymore, except me? I would like to get off the damn road and GO HOME to do the things these morons prefer to do in their Cars. Email and text friends, make important calls, drink my coffee, eat lunch and put on lipstick. Or like the moron I saw today, I prefer reading my newspaper at home, NOT while it's on the steering wheel and I'm going 55! Is NO one worried about safety out there?? Maybe, I am becoming an old cranky woman? Am I alone on these observations? Do these people who occupy these roads with me KNOW how distracted and inconsiderate and DANGEROUS they are??
In a few months I will have the very scary and very undesirable job of teaching my youngest child to drive. GONE are the days when we advised our kids to "keep your eyes on the road" Now we need to teach them as impossible as it may sound to accomplish... "Keep your LEFT eye on the road ahead of you as at the same time you Keep your RIGHT eye on your rear view mirror, making sure the texting, speeding fool behind you doesn't get you from behind!" The only person who comes to mind who could probably have actually pulled off this trick was Marty Feldman! Who knew being cockeyed could have its advantages? Like the above pictures depict... distractions= disaster. If my rant has helped anyone take a better look at their driving, I am happy I ranted!

singing a mourning song

( click to enlarge photo, Do you know what kind of bird she is??)



If you are very sensitive and your heart breaks easily... You may not want to read this post.

Yesterday Morning as usual, I sat outside, quietly having my morning coffee. I noticed a bird fluttering down near where my dog was standing and The silence of the morning was instantly broken. I jumped up to see what was going on. My dog was trying to paw and nudge a baby bird. The birds poor mother was franticly screeching and swooping. I screamed for Cosmo to stop. He backed away from the poor little bird. Sadly, It was too late, he was gone. I assumed he must have fallen from his nest but I later observed that the nest is not near where the poor little bird died so I know he didn't fall. Maybe he was just beginning to learn to fly and fluttered downward Unaware that there was a schnoodle standing by and waiting for any kind of excitement. Cosmo has been standing in this area for many hours each day. There are baby rabbits living in between my section of fence and my neighbors. It appears that these neighbors have a berm in their back yard against the fence, making a perfect habitat for nesting animals ( Happy it's rabbits and not rats, I wish they would clean up their yard.)
The poor mother bird did NOT stop screeching, She nervously flew down to inspect her baby. Then she flew on top of the playhouse above her poor baby and screeched. She flew back and forth all day. In between digging for worms for her babies and her nest, she flew the shortcut to the playhouse. It was so apparent that she was mourning. It is So apparent that she is screaming with grief, that I cried along with her. I feel so sorry for her. This morning she was there again. Back and forth and to the exact spot he had died.
At one point this morning, she and several of her friends were screeching and swooping down near cosmo. I really believed they had a plan to gang up and peck the heck out of him. This may be an inappropriate feeling but I wish they would have found the courage to at least give him one slap with their wing. ( I am still so angry at him.)
I know it's an innate instinct for a dog, especially one with terrier blood, to 'hunt' for animals. he is really a gentle dog and the way he wags his tail waiting by the fence hoping these bunnies will appear, shows me he wants to play with them NOT eat them. I guess you could say this was a circumstance of the cruel but natural order of nature.
I know he wasn't trying to hurt that poor baby bird. He wanted to play with it. It doesn't make her grief any less. This morning I captured some pictures of her. I wish I knew what type of bird she is. I wish i could ease her pain, I wish I could help her protect her other babies. I hear her screeching so loudly any time a squirrel is near the nest. I really really am so sorry she lost her little one. I just know tomorrow morning, she will return to her babies last spot and she will break my heart again.



(to the right of cosmo is where the baby landed. To his left is the fence that cradles baby rabbits.
He doesn't leave this spot )

vistit 3 word wednesday here

thankyou thankyou!

Gee.. If not for blogging, My life would have been Awardless! NOW I can proudly display two more, sweet, complimentary,
Lovely Awards on my blogging mantel! Thanks so much Sweet Jen! AND Sweet Diane ! If i help 'make your day' even a pinch better, Ooooh that makes me feel Like a successful blogger for sure! Thanks so much. This really lifted my spirits.


hello?? excuse me, Yes you, If you're reading my blog today and have EVER left a comment... YOU have made MY day!
Please accept this blogging award from my mantel to yours!

kissed by kismet

The sunday scribblings prompt this week is Chance Encounter ( volume up to hear 'our song')


As he made his way into an empty desk, He had no idea that his future soul mate was sitting a few desks in front of him.
Even though the Beauty School classroom was predominantly female, SHE caught his eye.
The next evening, He made a point of sitting next to her and sharing small talk with her. Soon, It became apparent that the attraction was mutual. Each day the talks grew more and more intimate. Each day the magnetism grew more and more intense. But WAS this just a chance encounter? A young man who hardly ever even went to get a haircut. A young artistic man, who was considering an education in fine arts. With just A casual suggestion from his then current girlfriends hairstyling dad, "why not try cutting hair?" This young man on a sheer whim made a detour and he entered another world... her world. Chance encounter? Or was his Destiny calling him and pulling him towards her?
He believes wholeheartedly in Destiny. Over thirty years later, He feels it in his heart each time she looks at him. If he hadn't attended that school, she WOULD have crossed his path somewhere at sometime. They WOULD have felt the same sparks, They would have made the same connection. No chance encounter here my friends. We are destined to the ones we love.

withdrawn

indifferent
reason
pour

I could pour my heart out into this vast cyber space
God knows the many reasons my heart needs unburdening this week
You may respond indifferent, You may respond with grace
solitude summons me silencing my habitual need to speak

Visit 3 word wednesday here