happy halloween

Well it's halloween night. Not much happening. We celebrated last week by going to a party at the dance studio where I take my zumba classes. It was a fun night, that started with a west coast swing lesson and led into dancing all night, buffet and unlimited drinks. All for the amazing cost of 36.oo per couple! Our Friends that came with us were as surprised as we were when everyone on the floor was AMAZING at dancing! It then of course dawned on me... WHO were the guests? Dance instructors and their dancey friends and dance students!! At one point they were all doing some beautiful waltz the same exact way, going the same way around the beautiful dance floor... while the 4 of us clowns (well.. actually 2 pirates and 2 cowboys) were free styling and bumping into them all! After only one cosmo, we didn't care that we were the only foursome that they thought had 8 left feet. We had fun and many laughs and know WE CAN Dance!!

this week was a good one, there's lot's of adventures going on yet it left me once again.. Thinking of my blog.. feeling obligated to write something on it... choosing instead to play my 29 games of scrabble that I have going on on Facebook. Facebook is probably the reason for less blogging. It is quick and a great way to touch base with many with one wall. But.. my blog feels like an old friend. A friend who I will always love but I have less and less to say to her.
So without much thought... I am going to ramble about my week and just fill my old friend in..
This past week, Mr. Petals and I celebrated our 29th anniversary! We had a date day that involved shopping for a dressy dress for me for an upcoming christmas party, A new sports coat for him and Ordering a new railing for our back steps. That evening we enjoyed a lovely romantic italian dinner at Marios.
One day, my son found a weird protrusion on poor Mr. cosmo that ended up being a tick! In all my years of having pets, I've never had a flea or tick on any of them! It looked like a rotten kernel of corn! My smart son insisted that it was some sort of parasite. We ran Cosmo to the vet who confirmed it was an engorged tick. So gross and so worrisome! But he is fine and since it wasn't a deer tick, he won't need to be tested for Lyme. It was so nice that our vet didn't charge us to tweeze it off of him. Cos was pretty stressed, but a few dog treats later.. just fine.
Another on going event of many past weeks is this college application stuff! WHAT an overwhelming, mind boggling process! I feel like WE are so far behind! I use the word WE so much ( We applied here and WE applied there) that my oldest son keeps asking WHerE I am going to be attending college next year!? He is right! I am doing way too much of the stressing over this! I hear my clients tell me that they NeVEr got involved... their kid did Everything!!
you know what?? I am going to add my name to one of these app's.. and You never know.. If I get accepted maybe I will be the one that sets sail next year and my youngest can do all my jobs at home!
Well, once again.. I thought I couldn't blog and I end up writing more than I think anyone will even read. Hope to be back soon

Did you ever?

Lately I keep feeling like our world is getting more and more crazy. People seem to have Less compassion, Less patience, Less humanity than ever before. I questioned if it was just me thinking this way? Am I just getting older and crankier? You know what? No. that is not it. The world IS getting crazier and It isn't just the younger generation. Even older folks are... well .. Losing it! I see more selfishness and rudeness than I ever remember noticing before.

Tonight I spoke to my 80 year old Mom who lives on her own down in Florida.
Mom volunteers at the hospital a few days a week and volunteers as a bingo caller in between.
She has been calling bingo for years and gets much praise for her fun, outgoing personality.
Last week an 87 year old man got a bingo but hesitated a little too long to shout it out and My mom had already called the next number to which 3 additional people shouted BINGo! The 87 year old mans wife began repeatedly calling my mom a BITCH! Screaming that she went too quickly and that her husband deserved the pot all to himself! ISN'T THERE SOMETHING CRAZY AND SO SO WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?? I am telling you, something bizarre, scary and so sad is happening in the world. We seem to be desensitized to the feelings of others. Decency and morals a thing of the past. My poor mom was so upset and didn't know what to say or do.
I feel so bad to know she was spoken to like that. Mom called The director of the senior center, who told her that she did do the right thing.. Once the next ball was in the slot she had to Call it and honor the multiple winners. Just what an 80 year old donating her time needs, right? insults and aggravation.

On the way home from Bingo, mom stopped off for gas. She waited behind a station wagon while he filled up. After he was done.. He continued to sit in his car and chat with the attendant who was apparently his friend. They both acted totally oblivious to the fact that someone else was waiting. After waiting for a good 5 minutes patiently in her car, my mom leaned her head out the window and said.. "excuse me, would you mind getting going now?" The attendant went inside the gas station and the man in the station wagon deliberately just stayed in his car a few minutes longer. She knew it was just to bother her a little bit more!! HE was inconsiderate from the start and because She asked him to move, he decided to torture her even more?? Hello??? Is it just me?? Does this make any sense? Or are you infuriated too? He should have apologized and quickly moved over or out!! Finally my 80 year old (extremely brazen) little mama... Got OUT of her car and started walking towards him. He finally drove off! I got so upset that she did that! I warned her that with the looneys these days, you can NeVER assume he wouldn't have hurt her.
Hasn't this kind of rudeness and maliciousness happened to you? Do u feel it's happening more often too? What do you feel is the best way to handle hateful, ignorant strangers? I always say ignore these types but how can you in the gas station situation? I swear, I wish I could spray my mom with cretin repellant.

From Dizzy to canine.

Being Bored out of my mind for the last two days may be a good reason to try and write a blog post.
On Monday I went to Dr. Gordon's office for the Epley Maneuver. After seeing the Youtube about the procedure I was expecting that it wasn't going to be too awful. Damn You youtube. My experience wasn't so cut and dry or tear free. After the first procedure of gently rotating my body and head for one minute in each position, They told me they now had to repeat the same procedure and this time I most likely would not be as dizzy. As soon as he laid me backwards, not only did the dizziness feel much much worse, i could also feel my eyeballs spinning quickly around in my head!! Nausea kicked in, It was terrifying! As if all that wasn't scary enough, Dr. Gordon indecently said... "This is very unusual" and he began to tell his assistant something about my eyes. I was so busy panicking and crying that I really don't know what he said. I remember saying.. What's wrong !!?What's happening???!! And he said.. I'm not completely sure but just hang in there the spinning will stop any second now.. and it finally did!! He continued with the rotation of positions and explained to my husband Something about my crystals being in different canals, but I really couldn't comprehend it in my state and I didn't need an explanation later either as I was so queasy and lightheaded, and i just wanted to go home.

What I did understand was that i couldn't know for sure if this maneuver cured my vertigo until after 48 hours had passed. So, If I was still feeling dizzy, that didn't mean it was unsuccessful. (but I sure have been frustrated that I am still feeling dizzy and lightheaded)
As part of the after care.. to prevent the ear crystals from being moved back into the sensitive part of the ear, I've been wearing a soft cervical neck collar to prevent sudden head jerks and bending. I can't sleep in bed but in a recliner at no more than a 45 degree angle.


It's been quite uncomfortable but will be worth it if this works..(as u can see, it has been very comfortable for Miss Molly and Mr. Cosmo, who haven't left my side and feet) If it doesn't work.. He wants to repeat the Epley Maneuver when I go back on Tuesday. I've read that Sometimes a few times is the charm.
(Great.)

The strangest thing happened monday night while attempting to sleep in the recliner. At about 4 am.. I heard this high pitched sound. Almost like a radio frequency that was out of whack. Without bending my head, I wrigggled my way out from under Cosmo and out of the recliner and started wandering around my home, trying to find out Which of my sons had left his tv, radio, cds, game player or SPACE TASSER?? on... I went all the way upstairs, I went down again. i went into the basement... and then I realized it was loudest in my kitchen... Where though?? First the napkin holder. I held it up to my ear.. it was buzzing so loudly.. then I put my ear up against the Light switches and FOUnD the source! High pitched sound waves or something?? I was so so confused... and then the light bulb in my dizzy head went off... Holy Shit! this may be ALL in my head?!! In my ears?? Does this mean the maneuver worked? Or does this mean I will be picking up the local radio stations in my ears and fillings now?
As I maneuvered myself and the dogs back down.. I felt this keen sense of hearing for the rest of that early morning.... I heard several loud jets. Trains. (which are so far from our home... I didn't know we ever heard them over here) I heard the crickets as loud as if they were sharing the recliner too. It was the weirdest experience, and I am trying to look at this as a positive sign that I am fixed! Even thought the audiologist said my hearing test last week, was good... who knows... maybe My hearing is even better than good and like My friend Carol said.. Maybe I have dog hearing now! Wouldn't that be great. Well, I already have the collar on.... Maybe I can get a matching leash and pooper scooper for Christmas.

visit 3 ww

An exciting addition to our blog family

I want to share a fairly new blog with you! On Lives was created by my sons friend Mike. He has come up with such a clever, creative blog to touch ON so many varied topics in our LIVES. He also has guest writers contributing and from what I've read so far.. Everyone is talented and interesting! Hope you will pop over and browse, comment and then perhaps decide to follow this talented writer.
I've decided to start at his first entry and work my way up his assorted posts.
(btw..ON dishwashing cracked me up!)
Thanks blog buddies... And thanks Mike.. it's so nice to expand my blogging family.

BuMp in the Night

With Vertigo spinning me out of control this month... HOW appropriate is the sunday scribblings prompt??
My spinning is the worst at night while trying to sleep. Rolling over is a thing of the past as I can only sleep on my right side. Turning left makes me fly around the room. Unfortunately... visiting the bathroom in the night seems an inevitable occurrence and BUMPing into the walls is my typical way to sidewind my way to the toilet! This past week...I've knocked over my alarm clock, my lamp, stepped on my dog cosmo and knocked a picture off the wall! Luckily I caught it with my hands and not the top of my head!! Luckily too that Cosmo didn't even yipe (he has an unusually hard head for a little schnoodle!) All this while spinning and needing to urinate badly!
Each morning mr. Petals gets annoyed and says.. Wake me up!! I will help you get to the bathroom..
but I just don't want to disturb him that way... Best he is only disturbed by lamps and clocks and pictures bumping in the night, right??

I went to a doctor yesterday that specializes in... DIzZY people. (people have been calling me dizzy for years...who knew it was a specialty?!)
He diagnosed me as having BPPV and feels he can fix me with NO meds and NO surgery...
(Mr. Petals asked him ..."what are you going to do, say a chant over her head?" but NO..it is called the Epely maneuver and it looks crazy and I fear it will make me vomit... but I am praying it will help me. (my quick explanation to my sons was.. I have little crystal rocks in my ear that are out of whack.. He is going to turn me around a few times and move my rocks to a better place!! ) He said 80% of patients with BPPV are able to be helped by this method, saving lamps and pets and additional potential problems that could be caused by spinning and bumping out of control.
After the maneuver I have to wear a soft neck brace and Not lie down for 48 hours, I'll sleep in a recliner chair... No bending, driving, working. NO ZUMBA for sure!!! (I"ll have to ask him.. i sure hope it means no cooking, cleaning or laundry either)
WISH me Luck on Monday!!

September Synopsis

If I have any readers left they would know.. I haven't been blogging lately.. lately.
But I thought I would summarize my September for ME.. just to write something. Just for my own entertainment. Just to pass a few minutes while I try not to SPIN out of control.( explained later)
September! Wow It really flew.. Just like I feel the year has flown by.
My youngest Son began his senior year of High school. We both began the crazy college search.
I have found myself BEYOND overwhelmed with the whole process. Even though I had two other kids go off to college... this new OLDER, forgetful Me.. feels totally clueless with the entire process.. as If it's all new to me. I sent a frazzled email to his guidance counselor and I was wacky enough to write.. It may be menopause or Dementia but I sure need HeLP!

Another wacky undertaking in September... I actually went to a 10 hour Zumba workshop and am Now a Certified Zumba instructor! I know! Hard to imagine, right? I love this dance/exercise program so much but while taking the course.. I initially felt I would never be able to find the time (and talent) to choreograph routines and be courageous enough to begin teaching. After another week of reviewing the dvds they gave me and speaking to my amazingly inspiring Zumba teacher.. I began to think.. Hey why not? I don't have to be as intensely energetic as her or as skilled... and in her words... 'there are different types of zumba teachers for different types of students YOU CAN DO IT LUCy"... So I was ALL excited and pumped and
Then...

hello hello... I am (once again) in a place called Vertigo...
The spinning hasn't been as bad as back in '06 but it is preventing me from living my normal life and I am pissed off about that beyond any words! The last time it occurred, my doc sent me for an MRI.. but she never sent me to an ENT.. I really think that is who I need. Besides the usual spinning and nausea I am feeling like my ears are full of fluid. I have also been experiencing Crazy CRAZY buzzing in my ear! Especially while laughing hard!
Last week a New client had me hysterically laughing.. All of a sudden I SLAPPED the side of my head so hard it knocked my glasses off my head! Because I Thought a BEE had flown into my ear! She looked at me strange and I Laughed and only said.. "i am laughing so hard my glassses fell!!"..... ( and she looked at me weird as if thinking... YEAH! because you slapped yourself in the head Wacko!)

There have been some good things going on in September!! BAck in August for my 50th b.d. My friends had gotten us tickets to go see BYe Bye Birdie on broadway and an italian dinner before the show. The play was so cute and I was excited to see John Stamos play Dick Van Dykes role.
Gina Gershon was also in the show in the role of Rosie.. I had loved the movie back in the 60's when I was a kid. I thought they did a great job!
Also for my B.d., One of the gifts from Mr. Petals was Tickets to see Rusted Root in concert on Sept. 24th.
We have loved this band since the early 90's and I was so happy to get a chance to see them perform. The venue was a small theater, so after the show they signed Cds.. and I actually got to meet, TOUCH and talk with the lead singer Michael Glabicki.. who I loooveee!! Mr.Petals thought I looked 13 years old running to get on line to get his autograph... and u know what?
I felt 13! it was silly but fun and it made me happy! We also met and really really enjoyed the opening band.... The Kin. We bought their cds and are really enjoying their music as well. Two nice brothers from Australia. I hope they become popular because they have beautiful voices and are so talented AND so so nice.
I think synopsis means a sHOrt summary?? This is more like a September Story...

but anyway... besides my vertigo... i had a few other problems in September that are wearing my nerves down. First.. I injured my knee the week before the zumba workshop.. I have been trying to baby it, ice it, massage it, hot tub it and do some exerises that my son showed me he did in Physical therapy for his knee... but it may be time to see the doc. since it is holding me back from being as active as I usually am. Another problem that has me shocked and pissed off...
the Opthamologist is pretty sure I have glaucoma.. No I didn't turn 80 last b.d.. Only 50!
I am so worried.. He wants to repeat all the tests again this time early in the morning to see if it is the same result.. but it is an inherited disease and my mom has it ( although she didn't get hers till 79!)

So let's see.. what have I forgotten.. I Touched on the knee the eyes the spinning the zumba the college stress and the two fun shows... what have I forgotten about September?? Blogging!
I haven't kept up with my favorites or posted much of my own.. Hope I get inspired soon to post regularly and with a bit more flair than than just recapping.
Also let's hope October takes it's sweet time because I hate to believe that freaking Christmas is around the corner!

My brain may be made of cheese

I have had NO inspiration to blog lately! When I happened to see the Sunday Scribblings Prompt... CHEESE...
right after I had had a bit of a memory lapse yesterday....It Hit me! My brain is turning into cheese! (mostly likely a genetic italian medley) I used to be able to take a small happening in my life, a problem, a happy moment, a funny occurrence, a worrisome moment... and tell a little tale about it. My life is still full of many types of moments.. but Cheese just doesn't seem to be able to process thoughts.
Yesterday I took my son to the pediatrician and they asked me to sign and date something...
I signed my name and then dated the paper 9/25/84. I'm not sure if the expression on my 16 year old sons face was worry or embarrassment as he quietly but firmly said to me... MOM?? It's TWO THOUSAND and NINE! The receptionist glanced at what I had wrote and threw me an expression that I sadly fear many people use on the mentally challenged. (or those with cheese for brains). I felt the need to defend my decades of memory loss by saying.. OH i must have been thinking of Franks Birth day because he was born on the 25th of June 1984... (Apparently my young son didn't see the logic in that connection since it's September) BUT... I still say.. there was some kind of connection that brought me back 25 years! As for the snooty receptionist.. she then began to SLOWLY question me to make sure all of our info. hadn't changed! She must have sensed the aroma of melted Mozzarella.

What's really starting to worry me, is that for as long as I can remember my mom has always had memory issues especially when it came to pronouncing words and names correctly.. She is a regular Norm Crosby (if u remember who he is). My sister and I stopped correcting Mom MANY years ago.. because No matter how many times we told her her favorite singer was NOT AnKle-Bart Hummerdinger but Engelbert Humperdink.. She just never could remember! Mom hasn't lived in Brooklyn since 1954... but it's still Earl and Ferl to her where it is Oil and foil to me. She still calls me my siblings names before she hits on mine! Last week she was ranting about her aNOONies for 10 minutes NON stop.. till I realized she was upset about her insurance annuities.
Many years ago while talking with my sister.. we began to wonder... WHAT if Mom had a normal brain when she was our age, after all she raised 3 kids all by herself and handled many tasks just fine....so what if we have some kind of disease in our family that causes a perfectly good brain to slowly turn to mush over time?... Not so much like Alzheimer's but more like... curdling. CURDLINg?? OH No!
See that! My brain really IS cheese!

Totally uninteresting, but hey... I wrote something!

So we switched our phone company BACK to cable. We had verizon for forever. Then, Cable made us a godfather type of offer for a year. But When the year was up we went running Back to verizon because there were a few problems with the cable phone service that were driving (mostly me) us crazy! With verizon the problems were fixed but then we received the first verizon bill, and we saw that their price was waY higher than it had been the year before! Simultaneous to this discovery, cable sends another irresistible offer in the mail. Bottom line, we are saving about $40.oo a month by switching back to Cable PLUS they are giving us a $200.00 gift card for coming back to them which is making us feel like these few little problems aren't worth paying 40.00 extra per month. How quickly we forget... Today the problems started again... and I am wondering if a measly $10.00 a week, a mere $1.43 per day is really too much for lack of aggravation??
** Cable phone Problem #1-
ECHoing !! I am hearing ME! MY squeaky annoying voice echoing loudly! I find it impossible to concentrate on the caller when I am trying SO hard not to sound SO awful!!
**Cable phone problem #2-
Often when a caller is leaving a message on my machine they hear a clicking noise which makes them THINK someone has picked up while they are leaving a message... so I get them saying "luanne? Luanne"? Hello?? Hello?? Did u pick up?" and that is NOT good for business or for relationships of any kind!!
**Cable phone problem #3-
With Verizon I could look through my caller Id's.. find the number I need to call back and just hit send... with Cable... this phone feature doesn't work!! I have to write down every number when people leave messages and dial them the old fashioned way!! It may not sound like it's so much trouble, but because of business.. I sometimes return as many as 10 calls... trust me, the other way is a real time saver. We are locked into cable for a year.. a loonnngg Echoey, clicky, hand cramped year. (I've decided to put up a sign in my salon explaining the clicking so I don't take a chance of losing clients who may think I pick up a phone call but don't speak as I quietly giggle with my 12 year old friends)
So there you have it... Blogging has been reduced to this.. venting over telephone services.
Will I ever get a bit of creative inspiration ever again??

Oh Pabbi Minn

Today as I listen to a favorite tune... It brings to mind this older post.. and since I've been taking a bit of a sabbatical from blogging... I decided to RE-post one from a few years ago.. Maybe because I miss blogging or maybe because of the palpability of my grief or maybe I am hoping my few readers are still checking in to see if I have anything worthwhile to say... Whatever it is... I am sharing this again until some creativity comes over and hits me on the head with a brick or something.
thanks for checking in!

My dad passed away when I was 3 years old. My memories of him are more ingrained in me because of the stories I've heard about him. I'm not sure if they're real memories. My dad had a heart condition that was brought on from having Rheumatic Fever as a child.( With todays medical miracles, he could have been cured.) He was frail and restricted from vigorous activities. One story about him that I always treasured was that he always carried me around on his shoulders. My mom would always worry that I was too heavy and would yell at him to put me down. As a parent myself, I understand why he didn't listen. If you know you aren't going to be with your kids for too much longer, you take your chances and hang on tight.
I was (and still am) "the baby" of the family.
(When you are "the baby" you take this title with you till the end! I'm 47 and my mom still refers to me as the baby).

I think The weird thing about losing someone so important at such a young age is that the grieving process is the opposite of losing someone as an adult. As an adult the pain is present for a long time and fades a bit, the longer time has passed. The opposite is what I've been experiencing. Of course at 3 years old I had no clue of what was happening to my family. As I grew, there were times I felt curious and even embarrassed about not having a dad. During my teen years, I thought often of him and wanted to hear the stories and "get to know" him. As a young woman planning my wedding I wept -- knowing that he wouldn't walk me down the aisle. He wouldn't know the woman I had become or the man I was going to spend my life with. Raising my sons, I wished for their sake as well as for my dads that they would have had each other to love and learn from. Even Now, 44 years after he has died, I think of him often and get choked up as I am now, trying to write this.
One of my favorite songs brings me to tears each time I hear it. It is Bjorks version of an old song called oh my papa. In her native icelandic language it translates to Pabbi Minn. ( If you click this you can hear her beautiful version) Even though I don't understand a word she is saying, I can't hear this song without missing my poor dad. As I listen to her flawless, gripping voice- I can imagine myself weightless on his loving shoulders, being carried into my future with him always being there, making my life's journey simply idyllic.

An old post resurected

Like most women, I find shopping for a dressy dress almost as torturous as the dreaded bathing suit search. However, Yesterday my shopping experience was terrifying. I finally found a dress I liked. They didn't have my size. The saleswoman suggested I try the dress anyway, If I liked it, they could order my size. Fine. The pickings were so slim, Even though I knew this dress was probably one or two sizes too small, I decided to forge ahead. I entered the the desolate hallway that housed 3 small fun house mirrored boxes. In my foolish haste, I forced this tiny beaded contender over my crazed (apparently) Large head. I squirmed and shimmied and shoved and pulled. I got it over my huge head and managed to strangle my raised arms as well. That was it. I was stuck like that. Panic struck. I wanted to call out for help but the glimpse of my bikini underwear barely on ,while a beaded straight jacket covered my head and arms, was too embarrassing to draw attention to. The mental image (or in this case fantasy) was clear and frightening. The firemen are called- they need the jaws of life to remove the assailant. I am left in my bright orange (too small) bikinis, battered, bruised, breathless (bra-less) and totally mortified. BUT- The handsome fireman (who axed the door down)gives a sexy smile & his bright yellow jacket to cover my flustered, perspired body.
Even though the fantasy of him eases my panic a smidge- I know I need to do this on my own. Miraculously, through my one eye that isn't enshrouded in material- I spy a Zipper! Oh my God, this dress had a zipper? I manage to reach it and pull just enough to get a whole hand out. I escape! Let me tell you though, For Five LONG minutes I didn't think I would without ripping that (fantasy sized) bully in two.

not out of the loop for long

I am just not ready for tomorrow to be BACK TO SCHOOL day!
WHERE did this summer go to?? And how did my kids grow so quickly?
Tomorrow begins my youngest sons SENIOR year and My TWENTY FIRST and LAST year of sending one of my kids off to school in my district. Surreal? you betcha! After this, he will hopefully have at least 4 years of college and then I am hoping I can fly off to Tahiti without any of them missing me.

I have been in this school district for TWENTY-FIVE years. Half of my life! Many years ago it was brought to my attention that we have a WEEKLY community newspaper. My friend referenced something from it and showed it to me, and I discovered this very informative paper was free to district residents. This little paper also seemed essential for people with kids in the district, keeping you up to date and in the loop. My address was somehow overlooked and left me out of the loop. (maybe that is why many friends call me loopy?) anyway.. I called them... spare you the long conversation but they were going to send it to me..... you know how busy it is raising kids and living a hectic life.. I didn't notice it, but they never sent it... FAst forward to this past June.... Another friend quotes something VERY significant from this little important newspaper.. My memory is jarred and I call them AGAIN. WELL... NOW their new policy is it is only free for those who've already received it for free, any NEW residents must pay a yearly fee. HELLO??!!! I've lived here for 25 years! I reasoned with the idiot on the phone for a bit and then asked to have his boss call me... Let's see, that was about 3 months ago.. Do I give up?? After all.. Tahiti is only a few years off... NO, I can't give up! You see, certain things of principle make me absolutely craaazzzy!

I want this damn paper! I am not paying a penny for it! AND if they make me HOT enough I am also demanding 25 years of back issues!! (okay, that may be unreasonable and too difficult to recycle) But, remembering my success with the apple store....I WILL be calling tomorrow and hopefully after 21 years of being loopy with district news... This last year, we will absolutely be on top of things!

Haiku frenzy

The 3 word wednesday words are: glare luster and threat
I attempted FOUR, Yes 4 haikus..
which one do u like best?

Sensual Luster
in sparkling passionate glare
The threat of true love?

Her lackluster eyes
A glare sharper than a knife
Silent deadly threat

Her threat of revenge
The luster of her silk scarf
his glare choked in awe

your lustrous glare thrills
threatens my skin with Cha Chills
weakens all my wills

blue yellow

Lately, I haven't been blogging as regularly. I don't really know how I ever had the inspiration and energy to share my small little goings on with whomever would visit. I don't know why I have lost my blogging spirit. But I do know that Right now I feel like I've lost my spirit in general. I know it will blow away, it always does. Then, unfortunately it comes floating back again.. I call it a 'funk' when it visits. It's like a giant cloud that hovers over me making me feel the smallest task is just so overwhelming. My usually bright yellow aura changes to moody blue. I wish there was a way to chase this funky cloud away instead of waiting for it dissipate whenever it feels It's good and ready.
I miss reading all my favorite blogs. I miss participating in all my favorite prompt blogs. Hoping this heads or tails will help lift my blog funk and then maybe this other funk will float along for the ride.

my guys

Forever I carry you everywhere

I carry your joys, worries and fears
I carry your opinions, beliefs, ideas
Dreams wished for or wishes broken
Sometimes shared sometimes unspoken
I carry your heart aches and pain
disappointments that remain
I carry your achievements and wins
hearty laughs, devilish grins
I carry your humorous punk pranks
your thoughtfulness, sweet-thanks
I carry your love and kisses on cheek
your quirky ways & moody streaks
I carry memories of your childhood lives
along with visions of your prospective wives
I carry muted prayers for your future years
lavish with health & happiness, short on tears
I carry the memory of each precious birth
As I will you pride, strength, self-worth
I carry my eternal thanks to heaven above
For granting me the weight of unconditional love
Three sons I shall love from their infancy till I depart
Three sons I treasure carrying forever in my heart

sunday scribblings

headache haiku

Three word wednesday
Fracture
Noise
Vanish

My spirit fractured
Queasy from sight noise and sound
Migraine PLEASE vanish

Grow up!

sunday scribblings asks...What are your thoughts on adulthood? What do you want to be when you grow up? Are you scared of being an adult? Have you been forced to be the adult in a relationship? Do you have an adult child who won't grow up? Are you glad to finally be an adult? What do you think?
I think.. I will try to answer all of these colorful questions...

my thoughts on adulthood?? Adulthood is over rated! When we are kids we can't wait to grow up. I wished most of my childhood away just aching to be an adult, be in charge of my own life, my future, my decisions, my freedom. But when I look back, I was really forced at a ridiculously early age to do most of those things and ironically I was acting more adult at 8 years old than most adults do at 28. Yet the wishing continued and before I knew what had happened I was an adult in the eyeballs of society and up to my eyeballs in responsibilities. (be careful what u wish for?) ABSO-freaking-LUTELY!

What do I want to be when I grow up? Gee.. I just turned 50 but I am still working on that one!
that 8 year old couldn't wait to be a mama.. This mama loves being a mama and a hairstylist. But I feel like I am still growing and I still want to try my hand (or should I say FEET) at something more. I signed up for that workshop to learn how to be a zumba instructor. I am excited and a little nervous at this prospect. I've always had a passion for dancing... but I think my ultimate answer to this one would be .... happy and peaceful.. I just want to be happy and peaceful AS I CONTINUE to grow up.

Am I scared of being an adult? Not any more. Now I am more scared for my adult sons. I find myself worrying constantly. About their safety, their decisions, their disappointments and heartaches. I used to always put up the following Elizabeth Stone quote as an away message when i used to use AIM... EVERY parent will relate... "making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body"

Have I been forced to be the adult in a relationship? not at all! Although my husband and I share in all the adult responsibilities of our lives... Often (and I am so happy about this) He takes the roll of nurturer with me. I put up a fuss protesting his pampering and his treating me as if I am a 'delicate flower'***(see note below) .. but he knows I really like it, and need it and I know that he knows about that 8 yr. old acting like an adult portion of my life, so i know it all comes from loving me and wanting to compensate for the time when he wishes I would have been properly pampered. (did this make sense??) *** I remember seeing a tv show years ago.. where a husband so beautifully talked about how every relationship has you either being the gardener or the flower. I think it is true.. Most couples I know, it always seems the woman is the gardener, constantly tending to her flowers needs.

Do I have an adult child who won't grow up?
instead of saying NO COMMENT.. I will instead just say... I think times have really changed and young adults seem to be a bit slower at growing up than young adults in my day. And this goes back to the yellow question... Growing up and being an adult is pretty scary!

Am I glad to finally be an adult? 'finally' doesn't really apply to me, but YES I am happy to be an adult, Would be even happier to be a YOUNG adult all over again, but am just counting my blessings that I am not yet living in an adult home or living with an adulterer and have no plans on becoming an adulteress! Just an ordinary adult who sometimes acts very immature and is trying to just have lots of fun in her second act! :)

The Feast of St. Lucia!

It's been a birthday, vacation,whirlwind week! My friend tonight said it well... it's the Feast of Saint Lucia! I really like that! We've sure done enough eating to call it a feast.
My 50th birthday was on monday. I had been feeling a little overwhelmed by this surreal number, but as the amazing love poured in from my friends, family and even my clients.. The 'number' started becoming less and less relevant and the warmth and love I felt surrounding me became my focus and my greatest joy. I received so many moving cards and beautiful gifts and phone calls. I can't even express how much I appreciate all these thoughts! I received 3 flower deliveries! I lined them up on my table for a picture to show you and thought... Gee it smells like a funeral parlor in here..Maybe people are thinking I'm 50, i must be dying!! but No no no! I pushed that thought OUT of my wacky head.

The celebrating started last month when Mr. Petals gave me an early present.. my little ipod touch.
At first I thought I wasn't technologically engineered correctly to learn how to use it.
But after a friend walked me through it a bit.. it has become my new favorite toy.
I downloaded the scrabble app ( there's a tech term! it's short for application!!)
and now I can play facebook scrabble(which I may be hooked on) OUTSIDE in the sunshine!
(I recently compared the internet to running water and Mr. Petals is worried that he may have made a mistake with this gift!)
Since Saturday, we've enjoyed many dinners, much laughter, and CAKE!! Oh my! I think previously, I may have been cake deprived, because I can't seem to get enough CAKE!!
Whipped creme cakes, pound cakes, Peach pies, chocolate cake, and tonight at book club... cheese cake and crumb cake! YUMMM!

The best part of this week.. It's only Wednesday! Tomorrow my sweet Cara mia Carol is taking me out for a special italian lunch date! Then, in the evening it's off to the movies! On friday i am hoping to go BAcK to the beach. On Saturday we have a dear friends daughters wedding! Sunday we will be with other special friends and my vacation will sadly come to an end.. HOWEVER! the feast will continue in September when we celebrate with the theater tickets friends gave me to see Bye Bye Birdie on broadway!(with cutie pie John Stamos) As well as dinner in the city too! Also in September Mr. Petals and I are seeing one of our favorite bands.. Rusted root!
So you see that?! 50 is incredible! It's not so scary after all and it's FUN! and FUN is what I am all about at 50! I just want to have lot's of FUN!!
(if u read this whole spiel.. Thanks for listening!)

another haiku

The three word wednesday words are:
decay
graceful
riot

Once Graceful dancer

reflects as old joints decay

Thoughts run riot. heal.

The honour of your presence is requested at Lucy's fantasy dinner party!

I have imagined many fantasy dinner parties sunday scribblers! Usually these fantasies don't have SEVEN guests or revolve much around the dinner, so I am choosing to tell you about One dinner party that YOU are going to wish had an extra table setting for you.
My dinner party would be very casual. We would probably gather on pillows on the floor around a large glass coffee table with various candles and colorful dinnerware. I will be serving...(well.. wait... this is a fantasy right?? I will have my cabana boy.. Hugh Jackman serving dinner) He doesn't count as one of my seven guests because he is the help ( and part of another fantasy!)
The first to arrive will be Bjork. She will bring her uniqueness and probably some Icelandic dessert that will look like a beautiful swan but taste a bit unusual. Next to arrive will be Cyndi (Lauper)... She will make a noisy entrance as she shows her true colors... her Fun personality along with some homemade brownies. Billie (holiday) will be right behind her.. Bringing me a bouquet of gardenias as her haunting sultry voice thanks me for getting her a night away from her lover man.
We will all shine on when John Lennon walks through the door, he brings with him an aura of peace and puts us all in a more relaxed mood. He also brings my favorite red wine and I imagine I will sit him right to my right.
Freddy( mercury) has given Judy (garland) a ride, and they walk in together with energy and spirit AND a trail of groupie fat bottomed girls? ( hugh escorts the girls to the pool to chill)
We all begin noshing on grilled veggies and artichokes oreganata, chick pea salad, shrimp and lobster cocktail, delicious wines... Their voices begin to break out with song . I am swooning and goose bumped from the harmony of all my favorite talented singers. WaIT.. I stop swaying to their voices and sipping my wine to ask Hugh... Gee... why hasn't Jerry arrived yet? I hope he is okay... No sooner than me asking hugh (who btw, is wearing only a bow-tie on his sexy neck and an apron around his chiseled waist)
The door bell rings and IN walks Jerry Seinfeld... (yes I know he doesn't sing but I adore him)....
and he says.. Did u ever notice... how You can measure distance by time. "How far away is it?" "Oh about 20 minutes." But it doesn't work the other way. "When do you get off work?" "Around 3 miles." I'm Sorry I'm late... but your invitation with your address flew out my car window on the l.i.e.(long island expressway)! hey.. I brought you some NON fat frozen yogurt and Soup!

There u have it!
this was a fun one girls! Congrats to Laini!

What's new is quite old

Congratulations to sunday scribblings host Laini! She is about to have a NEW baby!
so.. NEW is the prompt for the week


So, what is New here in the petals residence?! WHEWwwww I can't even believe I am sharing this, but I just have to share it, because I just heard it and I still can't believe it and It is NEWS to me and I don't know whether I should be pissed or amused or REALLY pissed!
As mr. petals (notice I didn't capitalize the m in mr or the p in petals tonight) and I were having a wonderful soak in the hot tub and talking about this and that... THIS NEW information was revealed to me after being married to this man for nearly TWENTY NINE YEARS! Ends up, there was a woman he was MADLY in love with before he met me!! Now.. I knew he had been WAY around the block before I came along... I mean maybe...WAY around the neighborhood would be a better description. (or town? no... PLANET!) way around the planet is fitting! I've heard many tales about many women which have made me upset but I fought my emotions from bubbling over because it was just 'meaningless sex'. (apparently many can put those two words together, I never could.) (and also 'cause i always Coerce him into telling me, so I can't show I am upset!!) But THIS NEW revelation!! Holy shit! I mean what is a woman suppose to do with this information?! mr petals doesn't read my blog.. but I would feel like a creep, if I were to disclose any more of the UN F**#ING BELIEVABLE details of this relationship he was involved in. What I can't help wondering deep in my heart.. WHY? Why didn't he ever share this? I WILL TELL YOU WHY!! Because.. She affected him THAT much! That's why!! Why else would this have NOT come out early on in our dating?? And then there was planning a wedding for a year.. ya THINK maybe that would have been a good time to tell someone who is committing to spend the rest of their lives with you that You've already experienced being madly in love??

Of course he is denying today that he was madly in love with her..
denying that THAT was the reason this was never discussed... But I Am a WoMAN!! I Know!!
I know EVERYThing! I know about emotions! and feelings! and covert affairs! and scheming deception! and Silence speaking VOlumES!!! I know this is going to haunt me for a very long time. I also know I will need to drop this with mr. petals. (or he may never confess any other secrets!!) This man has devoted himself to loving me for over 30 years and I KNOW like I know my own heart... that he has been undeniably faithful and madly in love with me. So why then does this news have my stomach feeling like there is a spin cycle going on inside of it, pushing sudsy bubbles into my throat and heated FURY into my pulsing veins?? Why then do i feel so betrayed? Cheated on! Misled! Deceived! Can someone help me clarify why I am such a lunatic. OR AM i crazy to feel so distressed? Maybe I am not crazy and should go kill the bastard right now?? I am open for suggestions!! (not on how to kill him, I'm sicilian...THAT i can handle)

NaBloSoFroDraWe

Since my blogging has been off a bit lately (due to my brain being a bit off).. I've decided to follow my friend bones lead and dig down into the bowels of my draft bin to post a post that might otherwise have Not been posted! (if you are kind enough to read it, you'll know why)
Bone has officially named this commencement
NaBloSoFroDraWe 2009
which stands for National Blog something from drafts week! You are brilliant Mr.Bone!
So here is one of my least awful posts from that bin. Good thing I don't clean up my clutter, or i may have deleted them all!

Once upon a time(about 11 years ago) an adorable, curly haired little boy, so badly wanted a beautiful bright blue beta fish. He asked for one everyday. Soon his wish was granted! He quietly watched it swim in its bowl everyday. Everyday, he carefully fed it just the right amount of stinky fish food. He named his treasured fish 'fish'. One day while the little boy was out shopping with his mom, His very adorable but finicky dad, decided to clean fishes bowl. Being a bit of a perfectionist, Mr Finicky Petals decided that soap and water didn't work well enough. He brilliantly decided to go down to the laundry room ( where he is forbidden to go by Mrs. Petals for washing her bras with his dirty paint clothes) and get the Giant bottle of clorax. Fish swam around in a paper cup nearby as Mr. Petals got fishes bowl immaculately clean and smelling fresher than the day it was bought. Knowing how delicate fish like fish were, Mr. Petals knew he had to rinse rinse rinse it very well before putting fish back into that bowl.
After all that careful attention to rinsing.... It came as Quite a surprise to Mr. Petals when he plopped fish back in his spotless bowl, that he instantly turned from bright beautiful blue to pale light blue to laying upside down at the top of the bowl!! HOrriFiED! Mr. Petals quickly flushed fish and put the bowl out of sight, hoping his sweet sensitive little boy wouldn't notice too quickly. When curly head came home, Mr petals would get his second surprise of the day.. Curly wasn't as sad as he was ANGry! AFter much sensitive talking to curly head and promises of a new beautiful blue fish... It was finally revealed... THE FLUSH was the reason The adorable little (sadistic? ) child had wanted a fish in the first place. Apparently he saw THE FLUSH on a tv sitcom and THAT is what caused his desire to own a little fish! He wasn't sad that fish had passed away... but angry that HE didn't get to send him off down the toilet to his final resting place! He was waiting for THAT grand moment! Since then, we haven't let another little fish come here to die.. and Mr. Petals is banned again from going near the laundry room AND the big bottle of clorax.

zumba

A few posts ago I wrote about wanting to try to do something more with my life. I wrote about wanting to have more fun. Thanks to the encouragement of my family, friends and all my sweet blog friends who left comments to me to... GO FOR It! I am Going!! I actually signed up for a zumba workshop to become a certified instructor! I am planing on taking this one step at a time. Right now I can't imagine having the va va voom to actually be a teacher but i know I do have the za za zoom to zumba all day and learn what it takes! So on September 12th, Lucy won't be behind the haircutting chair snip snip snipping as she normally would be... Nope.. She will be on the dance floor (most likely grip grip gripping her chest and needing an inhaler) but also...
most likely... having Fun!
check out one of many zumba dance routines....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vf0q6qtThF4

( i wish someone could help teach me to 'share' the youtube
on my blog... I am signed up and hit share but it never appears!)

anticipating my golden years..

visit QUALITY posts over at sundayscribblings

whew, I got it.

So I drag myself home today after running around town, patronizing many shops in an atmosphere THICK with heat and humidity.
My head was pounding and I wasn't sure if it was due to the heat or dehydration or if it was my 4 pm caffeine withdrawal hitting harder than usual. As soon as I drank a glass of water and washed my hands I began fumbling..(yes fumbling and shaking) quickly getting my dirty coffee pot pieces out of the dishwasher and quickly hand washing them. As I dug my still damp shaky hand into my HUGE costco bag of dunken donuts coffee to locate the buried scooper, cursing it for being buried, it occurred to me... THIS must be what a drug addict feels like as they are desperately awaiting that next fix! I didn't care that the grounds of coffee were sticking under my finger nails and onto my rings. I didn't care that I was making a coffee mess on my counter. I didn't even care that I hadn't Thoroughly washed my electric pots basket and cover. I was only focused on the perk. Get it perking. Get it in my blood stream. Get rid of the headache. Get it Get it Get it. My infusion of caffeine will Cure the headache, Cure the exhaustion, cure the dragging and Allow me to get that second wind to prepare dinner. Ahhhh the darkness of the full bodied rich roast! My knees weaken as I pour and savor the distinct, intense premium bean aroma!
Then the sip! Piping hot, strong, robust flavor with a bite to it! I close my eyes, feel it enter my veins. The hectic day of running errands drains away and I Thank god my drug of choice is legal AND sold in bulk. Care to join me for a cup?


visit three word wednesday!

Where in the world?

Sunday Scribblings asks us....
Where in the World? Have you ever stood still and scratched your head and said, 'Where in the world?' Is there somewhere in the world you would love to go? Are you looking for someone or something or a place that makes sense to you? Where in the world are you?

Sometimes if I stop and think too long about Where in the world I am or where in the world I am going.. I think I may just cry.
Sometimes my world seems like an escalator to nowhere, an escalator that keeps taking me back and forth through life's daily necessities and routines. My escalator stops often for the needs of others. Weekly it leads me to Costco and the grocery store and back down to home again. Then It's up again...off to purchase beauty supplies for work, take my son to a dr.'s appointment, take my dogs to the vet. Pick up someone's prescription, drop off the dry cleaning, Pick it up next week.... Don't misunderstand... very often this escalator leads me to Happy Lucy days. A zumba class, A day at the beach, an afternoon with a friend, an evening at the theater. But really, even with a break in the routine, even with enjoying the happy times and frequent laughter that occurs within the ho hum routines... Where in the world am I going?? Is this all there should be to ones life? A series of routine chores and work sprinkled with bits of enjoyment?
In 3 weeks I will turn 50. I am feeling like there has to be more for me. More to me. I have so many ideas that I wanted to cultivate, Yet I never seem to have the time for them. I am feeling so happy and so alive and having SO much fun when I am dancing at my zumba class, that I've actually toyed with the idea of training to be an instructor, yet I think of my age and say... get real Lucy! My husband thinks it's not foolish, he wants me to just 'go for it' (maybe he has watched Rocky one to many times) Or, Maybe I should just go for it? Go for something. something fun. Reach for anything exciting. As I get older, I keep hearing Cyndi Lauper's words and repeating them as my mantra.. 'girls just want to have fun'.. and I DO! I really want to just have fun!
Sometimes, asking where in the world you are can make you cry but sometimes it can also make you try. Trying to imagine where you may be going may just help get you there.

I always want to give people the benefit of the doubt. I have to go through life believing that most people are basically Good. Believe That they want to feel good about "doing the right thing". Last week our son accidently tapped a car in the parking lot at work. He ran inside the building to ask who's car he had hit. The owner came outside and exchanged numbers with my husband, but because the damage wasn't too bad, She said she would get an estimate and let him know.
Later on at work.. My son was talking to that woman's son.. They walked outside to see the dent and then her son exclaimed to my son... OH THAT DENT WAS THERE ALREADY! When my husband took a second look at our own car that night... he realized that we just had a few scratches and to make the large dent that the other car had it probably would have caused SOMEthing more on ours! So when the dented owner called him a few days later... My husband told her what her son had said and explained how he felt we didn't have enough damage to cause such a dent. She denied the dent was hers! and on the spot Asked her son if he had said that the dent was there already. Of course, he lied and said NO! She said her son must have been remembering the dent on the other side of the car! SO, what are we to do? NOT believe her?? Then!! to make her lie even MORE obvious... she offered to SPLIT the estimated cost with us! SPLIT it? WHY?? If she didn't have that dent already.. WHY is she being SO kind to total strangers?? Good Samaritan or no good S.O.B.? Even though we have our doubts.. we paid up and want to feel good about 'doing the right thing'. ( but doubt sure puts a damper on feeling good.)

easy as 123

Today I did some math in my loopy head...
There are 65 days left of summer...
I have messy drawers and cabinets all over my home that
are overwhelming me and making me crazy.
I cannot bear to spend a summer day off
cleaning all day. And drawers?? They are worse
than dusting!! So.. I came up with The Perfect plan!
To begin, I started counting the messy drawers..
let's see... the desk I sit at to blog.. has 7 messy drawers...
Two of our bedrooms? (the older kids are on their own)
26 messy drawers (I need more fingers..)
but let me see.. so far...33..
then the kitchen? Yikes... 10 more
(EAsy adding 10) .. we're now at 43..
two more in dining area..45
Okay... So here is my brilliant Solution to this mathematical clutter equation ..
Do only ONE drawer each day and still have 20 days to spare! I CAN have these
all clean before autumn! Why didn't I think of it sooner?! and ONE drawer?.. i mean
HOW long can ONE take?.. I will start with ONE messy top desk drawer RIGHT NOW...
(hang on a sec...)

Gee that was REALLY easy, easy as pie! ... I just grabbed all the crap and threw it in the bottom
drawer of the desk. but, let me think... if I do that each day, then by day 7 I will have ONE very big job that will most likely be an all day job which will totally overwhelm me again...
I cannot BEAR to waste a summer day with this kind of job!!
(I was never very good at Math or planning )

My first haiku

hypnotic roses

drip with beauty of summer

shift sulks into smiles

This is my youngest son Joey and I at the planting fields Arboretum.
It was a gorgeous day but Of course like many teens.. He was a bit sullen about coming along. This gorgeous arbor of Roses had my spirit beaming and helped bring him around to really enjoying the day!
hope u visit 3 word wednesday!

Life is like an onion:

You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep. (Carl Sandburg)

When my eldest son was about 15 months old, I took him over to a local church to check out a gymboree program that was going to be starting up. I thought it would not only be a fun thing for us to do together, but would also be a good way for me to make new friends in this new town. The Church smelled like mildew ( something I am allergic to) and I wasn't crazy about the people running the program or the cleanliness of the area. So, I hoisted up my little one onto my hip and was preparing to leave when I heard a "PsssssT" I turned around to see a cute, friendly Mom also with her son on her hip. She whispered.. "This place sucks! Follow me, I heard of another one about 10 minutes from here" and she described where it was located. I buckled up my baby in his car seat and proceeded to follow this total stranger to the better place. Well, sure enough, she was right.. it was better, So Lyn and I both signed our babies up to attend the same class each week. Fast Friendships formed for our boys and for us. After the gymboree years our boys attended preschool together. Unfortunately, They were zoned for different elementary schools so as is sometimes typical with kids, the play-dates seemed to slowly diminish as they made more and more friends in their own schools. Lyn and I talked on the phone occasionally, but now, what with her having 3 more kids and 2 more for me. Life just got so busy and stressful and sad as it is..friendships, although always in your heart, sometimes grow more distant than you would have liked them to be. Through the years we would run into each other and we always felt the same warmth as if it had been only yesterday that we had talked.

At my sons high school graduation, we had arrived a little late. My husband and I, Our two younger kids and My in-laws were scanning the Huge humid gym to see if there were any seats left for us. All of a sudden I hear.... ' Luuuuuu" UP HERE !! I saved you seats! ' There she was again.. leading me to ...the better place. I awkwardly climbed those ridiculous bleachers in my sundress that I now wished were the shorts I almost chose. I sat down next to Lyn and began to well up with tears! I hugged her and realizing the poignancy said.."oh my god! we were together at gymboree Lyn! and here we are together again as they GRADUATE!!". There couldn't have been anyone I would have rather had at my side at that moment.

Here we now are seven years later. Lyn has been through quite a lot in recent years, worries that i feel are not my right to disclose. Dealing with worries that would have most Moms falling apart, Lyn remained a rock for all who surrounded her. I've always been the friend who wore her heart on her sleeve and Lyn has always been the one to say, with her bright warm smile.. "every thing's fine!!" (when i knew her worries were much more serious).
i just found out the tragic news that Lyn's husband passed away. My heart breaks for her and for her children. Just when you think you can't handle one more problem, Life throws one out of left field that you just aren't prepared to catch. I called her immediately after hearing
but now I need to be by her side, to hug her, to be her rock and hopefully help her..over time...get to a better place.

friendships warm the heart

Caring, loving, expressive and bright
Angels must have sent u to me
Resilient, spiritual, sage, survivor
Affectionate, warm and oh so supportive

Magnificent, magnetic beauty inside and out
Insightful in all matters of the heart
Always my beacon, forever my dear friend

I've written this acrostic poem for my special soul-sister Carol.
(I've appropriately renamed her Cara Mia.. )
Because she truly is...My dear one.
Thanks for always being there for me Cara Mia!
You are an amazing friend and I love u so much! xox

Paradiso

The Dogs desperately need a groomer
They smell like last weeks Sea Bass
The Vacuum has no zoomer
The Old Mower won't cut grass
The washer isn't draining right
Dirty soapy water fills up our sinks
I'm really trying to keep my chin upright
But Now the cesspool's starting to stink!

The Bricks in the steps are Frickin' Breakin'
The Bricks in the chimney- ready to collapse
Yet the Bank accounts been plenty achin'
While the Utility Bills have all lapsed
But the hot tub keeps on heating
As we try to soak our worries away
And the family requires daily eating
as if everything is just A-Okay
They've grown sick of old surprise dinner Pie
dreaming of something hearty,familiar and meaty
Me? I'm dreaming of saving myself and am wishing to just fly
Indulging in a one way ticket to freakin' Shangri-La Tahiti




sundayscribblings

He rocks my world

Do you remember some of my stories about colorful Mr. Petals? Maybe you've read the post about how he COOLS his pants, Or The tale about how he spent one spring spray painting squirrel tails? Today he was up to another peculiar project. When I woke up I found him outside at the picnic table waxing his rocks. Wait.. let me explain this clearer. He took two rocks from our flower bed and he first cleaned them with clorax cleanup.. and when I appeared with my morning coffee and newspaper to join him under our gazebo for our usual outdoor morning coffee..... He was waxing these rocks with turtle wax. He had already been up for two hours.. He had already washed and waxed the cars, blew off the driveway and patio, And even planed down the swollen door to my salon. So here he was now... waxing rocks. I looked at him like I was scared that he was going crazy. You see, We've had 3 days off in a row so far! That much time makes me worry for Mr. Petals! I even teased him last week...ooooh 4 days off in a row coming up?? DO u think you can stand that? Do u have enough tranquilizers on hand?

Me? I LOVE it! I can sit and relax in the sun with a book or in the shade with a puzzle for .... forever! He, on the other hand... can lie in the sun for about 10.. no! make that 5 minutes and he pops up sweating and anxious and off to accomplish more tasks! So this morning, after much work, he took a break by doing something relaxing... after thinking...." why not use these rocks for paper weights for our newspapers"? He would NEVER just throw a rock on the table.. NO...my meticulous husband ALWAYS needs to take things to the next level!! Perfectionist Like you can't believe!! He has been known to really make things THE BEST they can be but he has also gone so far attempting perfection that he has inadvertently scrubbed the finish off our kitchen chairs, our floors and even our bathtub! Now, Whenever I see him heading INDOORS with his belt sander ... I run! To stop whatever it is he thinks he can make even better!! (that reminds me.. did u read about HOW CLEAN he got my sons fish bowl?? with bleach!! poor little fish!)
Don't get me wrong, as weird as this peculiar behavior of his is.. It is also a reason we laugh like crazzzy! I have become very fond of doing exaggerated imitations of him. his ways, his expressions, how he goes about things! I love making him crack up WHILE at the same time allowing him to see just how zany he is! Laughter is such an effective and affectionate alternative to criticism and BOY did I laugh this morning holding down my newspapers with my scrubbed shiny rocks.

Human

sunday scribblings prompt today is HUMAN or Humanity.... I've thought about it while basking in the beautiful sunshine today.
I thought of it while sipping my second cosmo. I've thought about it while soaking in my relaxing hot tub. While reading my book. (BOY has it been a wonderfully relaxing and simply perfect weekend!) Each and every time my mind leisurely wandered to thoughts of what being human meant to me... My thoughts were interrupted because each time I couldn't help but break into song... Bjorks song... Human Behavior... So instead of breaking this lazy hazy weekend mode that I am so enjoying and trying to get MY thoughts onto the page... I am going to just let HER words do the prompt for me! (turn up the volume!)

If you ever get close to a human
And human behavior

Be ready to get confused

There's definitely no logic

To human behavior

But yet so irresistible

There's no map

To human behavior

They're terribly moody

Then all of a sudden turn happy

But, oh, to get involved in the exchange

Of human emotions is ever so satisfying

There's no map

And a compass

Wouldn't help at all

Human behavior

Did u ever?

Did you ever stop and wonder WHO you are blogging for? Is it for you alone? Is it to hopefully leave a little bit of you behind as a legacy for your loved ones? Is it for strangers that may stumble upon your post and be enlightened, amused, displeased, offended? Is it to receive comments? I've been feeling this uneasy pressure about blogging lately. Especially when it comes to participating in the prompt sites that I so love. It seems to me that to use these prompt sites appropriately, you must not only publish a post using the prompt, but you MUST reciprocate and read and comment on Many of the other blogs that also participate in the prompt. Is it just me or did you ever feel this pressure and find it uncomfortably overwhelming in our already pressured busy lives?? I mean somedays, I am lucky if I have enough time to just read my emails and write a quick blog post. It is a luxury to have enough time to reply to emails, write a blog post and Then try to Read (really read, not just skim) the many blogs that I love PLUS try to read (really read, never skim) The others that have participated in a prompt site that I've visited. PA- LEASEEEE! But blogging to many bloggers seems to be very much about reciprocating. Don't we reciprocate enough in our everyday lives?
You made me soup when I was sick.. so now You get a sore throat... I run soup to your house.
I sent you a 'thinking of you card' cause you were having a bad day... I have ... a pain in my ass..
You send me a get well card. I invite you to a dinner.. You feel obligated to invite me back.. Those are the realities of life. Polite, appropriate, friendly. To spill all this decency over here to the blog world is just a little too much for this decent but overly extended blogger.
Thanks to a little help from a very special friend (this song playing is for YOU!) a special friend, who always manages to enlighten and give invaluable advice, I've come to the conclusion that I DID begin blogging for ME and (with the hopes that blogger wouldn't decide to take a walk but be around a while) so my kids could possibly someday look back on all I've felt like sharing. So even though I love getting comments and love being a Decent respectable girl... I've decided I am going to just 'do my thing' over here like a blogging slut. Write what ever I feel like writing. If you like it great, if not.. also okay. I will continue to read blogs that I enjoy to read and comment when I have the time. I will boldly participate in prompt sites Regardless of wether I have ample time to reciprocate. If I am known as the RuDE blogger, Well.. so be it. I will be enjoying a pressure-free pass time like I used to 3 years ago when I was a rookie and unaware of the proprieties involved in ....blabbing.

Little boys and their toys

When ever I think of toys.. my mind goes right to the toys of my children.

When I was pregnant for my first son, Mr. Petals drove me over to an adorable store in a tiny quaint town nearby us. It was simply called "the teddy bear shop". Inside this sweet store there were wall to wall stuffed bears, many were dressed in various flattering outfits. I remember how happy I felt to try to find the perfect crib mate for the little cub hibernating inside of me. I was drawn to one little brown bear with an humble expression, who reminded me of a bear from my childhood. He wore a simple long white cotton nightgown. I named him Emmit Bear and he was lovingly placed inside my babies crib awaiting his arrival. He was very loved for many years by my eldest son. When my second son was born, time and money were a bit tighter and a trip to the teddy bear store was an extravagance that never entered our minds! Instead on our babies first Christmas, we went to toys r us and we picked up a cute stuffed lamb for him that had a blanket sewn into one 'hand' and a pacifier sewn to the other. My middle son dragged that little white lamb everywhere he went. He couldn't fall asleep without rubbing the lambs pacifier. I can't count the number of times I threw that little guy in the washer AND had to sew that plastic nipple back on this ragged little lamb! other toys that stand out to me are my older boys ghostbuster and Ninja turtle toys and my youngest son's Thomas the tank engine trains.

An adorable toy memory that also comes to mind goes way back to my eldest sons toddlerhood. This little guy just LOVED tools! My husband was in the trades and our little guy mimicked him whenever he worked around the house. He had a play electric saw and drill. He had plastic hammers and wrenches. He would build towers of wooden blocks and use his pull string electric saw to knock it down! He knew the name of EVErY TOOL he saw and would sometimes shock ME by saying .. No mama that isn't a wrench it's a Pliers. My husband brought him home a real tool belt from the hardware store. My son never took off that little canvas tool belt! One night after a long day visiting friends, our little one was so overtired and began getting cranky and went into an unusually crazed crying fit that was so out of character for him. I vividly remember how panicky Mr. Petals and I felt, because we had never seen him like this and we weren't sure what to do! Well, Mr. Petals sat on the floor with our boy and rocked him and just quietly started naming TOOLS! In a few minutes our son was so soothed and fell asleep right there in his daddy's lap. It was one of those priceless father/son moments that moved me to tears.
We just got back from celebrating at a Mexican restaurant because That little tool loving baby turned 25 this week! I am so happy that he decided to use his brain and heart as his tools of choice and he is on his way to becoming a special ed. teacher! Thanks for listening to me travel down memory lane! After two delicious margaritas... I am a bit nostalgic and a big mush!

We are the world

Today is my eldest son's 25th birthday.
As I was busily preparing one of his favorite shrimp dinners and at the same time, making an 'organic' birthday cake, I heard the shocking news of Michael Jackson passing away. I was just as shocked at how much this news affected me as I was by his unexpected death. Like millions of people.. I loved his music. Like millions of people, I felt so sad to hear that he died at such a young age. But, maybe it is weird of me to talk about this.. but it also touched me as being unusual that HE would die on my son's birthday. Let me tell you why.. When my first baby was born in 1984, Michael Jackson was THE hottest pop star of that year. As I filled in my new little babies 'memory book', it asked questions like WHO is the most popular star of the day...
I remember so clearly filling in Michael Jackson's name, The name of his latest album-Thriller.
The names of hit songs from the album... (never imagining that my babies 25th b.d would be the day this performer passes)
One year later.. 1985...that same little baby LOVED Michael Jackson's video.. 'We are the world'
I had taped it and when ever my son was cranky I would replay it over and over for him and it helped to soothe him. He would often stand in his playpen and point to the vhs tape to let me know, he needed another dose of we are the world.
So do u see why I am left with chills and tears today? I think it is an eerie sign or something. (anyone have any idea what this crazy woman is feeling??)

Then of course there is poor Farrah passing away today as well.. Her birthday? FEB. 2nd the same as my middle sons! I don't know why all this has my head spinning, i guess I am just seeing signs of strangeness where there probably are none. Oh yeah... the other eerie thing.... Michael was 50... I am turning 50 this year.(although he is one year older) BUT also born in AUgust like me!! I grew up with him! I remember so clearly watching the jackson 5 on T.V. and knowing Michael was my age. I felt connected because of that. I am so sad for him. Regardless of all the accusations and suspicions and surgeries and criticism... The man was an amazingly talented artist. An incomparable legend of generations. I hope the media is kind and he is remembered for all his extraordinary accomplishments. rest in peace poor Mj.
(I cannot post the video (wish someone would help me with this!!) but you can click here to see it)
we are the world video

first kiss

The Three word wednesday words brought me back to this memory..

With a sparkle of impulse and a spunky wink
She tip toes to reach for his willing lips
shyly wrinkles her nose, delivers tickles to his ribs
Her fickle escape from her very first kiss

Two Prompts on tuesday!

And I don't have the time and patience I wish I had... Solution? combine them! Over at heads or tails the prompt is Summertime memory!
One of my happiest childhood summertime memories was staying overnight often at my best friend Linda's house. She had the 'fun' neighborhood. Every house on her street seemed to have a bunch of kids living there! We would often play neighborhood hide and seek, running into every back yard to hide out. You can imagine that this game would last a long time with so many homes involved! Another favorite part of my summer time sleep overs... when School was out so was an official 'bedtime' at Linda's house. We loved staying up till the wee hours and sleeping all morning.
Late Late at night we would find our way into her kitchen and start making crazy snacks.. Or we would start making some prank phone calls! One of our favorite past times was playing 'shows'
We would take turns performing! Put on an old album from her parents 'weird' collection and start lip sinking and dancing around! Often crazy costumes were involved!! We had our own vaudeville right in her musty basement! I remember vividly LOVInG and performing the song...
"im just wild about HArrY and Harry's wild about ME!" hahaha (During the late 60's early 70's of my youth... this song was WAY out of date! But not to me!)


Sweet Linda adored Shirley Temple and would often tap dance and do Shirley songs! We each had to judge the others performance, we had our very own 'americas got talent' down in that haven of a basement!
It was After one of these critiques ... that Linda and I had an awful argument and I got so hurt and so angry at Her ....I decided to walk all the way home all by myself!
I lived quite a ways away and was only about 8 years old. When I think back now I thank god I made it safely there, and I think What spunk that little girl had! When I walked through my kitchen door, My mother was shocked to see me and couldn't believe I didn't tell Linda's Mom that I had left. She couldn't believe I walked all the way home all alone! I remember getting in a lot of trouble that summer! Linda and I of course made up as we always did. I remember her clearly... explaining to me and Clarifying what she had meant in her critique by saying..."well,Lulu
you would have understood me, had you waitedA few minutes for me to explain it ALL to you." ( hmmm...i guess I've always been a little impatient)
carryontuesday

vision

With a birth sign of Pisces, a whimsical dreamer he was certain to be
Optimistically visualizing his future bursting with success and glee
unexpected assorted crisis, pummels a vision that only expected perfection

A glassful of regrets with unrealistic presumptions stirred with a twist of dejection.

This poem came to me as I realized that sometimes being overly optimistic and
reaching for gigantic goals can backfire when these dreams don't come true.
Where as if your expectations aren't so grand...and life hands you a few lemons..
You aren't as crushed by the disappointment of it all. You make the best lemonade you can with what you've got
and get on with it.